Imagine the searing hate that Jared Dudley holds for his teammates. While Dudley operates as an extremely efficient shooter with an unstoppable three-ball, the lumbering troglodytic schlubs who surround him fail to have any positive impact on the court. Super Cool Beas is more like Super Suck Beas, Gortat is a whiner, Dragic isn’t Steve Nash, and Scola’s hair is constantly hitting people in the face. Not to mention that the Suns have Wes Johnson sitting around on the bench, infecting people with his contagions of shot-bricking putridity.
Oh, how Dudley yearns for the days of unstoppable Stoudemire pick-and-rolls and J-Rich bombing threes. A run-and-gun offense with Nash at the reins. Grant Hill boldly defying the laws of time on a nightly basis. Last night, the Suns went supernova, with Jared scoring 22 points on 9-of-12 shooting, but we all know that a team-wide relapse is inevitable. The Sun’s former glory is now a relic of the dusty, crumbling past.