Brandon Davies Career High 20 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2014)

The most notable thing to ever happen to Brandon Davies is when he got suspended from BYU for a large part of a season (including the NCAA tournament). Given my ingrained racial biases, I would have assumed that he stole some crab legs from a supermarket or smoked hella weed. Surely he would have to do something heinous like that to warrant a penalty that severe.

My head nearly exploded when I found out the real reason that Davies got suspended: he boned his girlfriend while they weren’t married. Apparently the Mormen take this stuff pretty seriously. But why would you even bother banning Davies from collegiate play when God will be the one handing down the ultimate punishment, i.e. eternal blistering hellfire? I hope Davies remembers his sunscreen.

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