I always assumed that Chris Johnson’s full first name was “Christopher”. That’s a fair assumption, right? Wrong. His name is actually spelled “Christapher”. From now on, I’m going to use his full name whenever I have to reference him (which is approximately once every never) so that I don’t cause confusion with either a.) the other basketball player named Chris Johnson, b.) the Chris Johnson I went to school with (I remember when he puked in the cafeteria) or c.) the famous Chris Johnson who plays football but now kinda sucks.
Oh, forget it. I’m never going to keep these guys straight. For all I know, the one in this video is the same one who puked right onto his tray of grilled cheese sandwiches. I give up.