Jonathon Simmons Career High 27 Points Full Highlights (10/29/2017)

True title of this video: “Jonathon Simmons Career High 27*** Points Full Highlights”. Notice those asterisks? While it’s true that Simmons did score 27 points tonight, I feel it is in the best interests of the viewing public to adorn his performance with three asterisks. Otherwise, people think that he well and truly earned his points, which he plainly did not. Allow me to explain.

Asterisk One: This asterisk has been applied to Simmons’ total because he took a bunch of free throws. He made some, he missed some, but the fact remains that he scored points in the most un-basketbally way possible. Did Kobe shoot any free throws when he scored 81? No, because he knew that no one would respect him if he did. It’s not totally Simmons’ fault that he got whistles in his favor, but he should have invoked his Naismith-given right to not shoot the foul shots.

Asterisk Two: He dunked the basketball, scoring two points, with only seven seconds remaining in a lost game. I don’t need to explain this one any further. Totally classless.

Asterisk Three: I don’t really have another point of contention against his performance, but three asterisks looked way more aesthetic than two. And, really, did we need more than the one anyway? Two is just gravy.

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