Some people have been saying recently that Ben Simmons is too good for my channel. That he has somehow graduated from being eligible for DTB highlights. Well, here’s a news flash for you bozos: every rookie is eligible for my channel. There is no such thing as a rookie who is too good to get a personalized highlights package from my masterful fingers. Even if they are a nightly triple-double threat and potentially the next major superstar in the league.
My opinion might change if Simmons makes the All-Star game this year. Under most circumstances, All-Stars are outside the scope of my channel, but the last rookie to make an All-Star game was Blake Griffin, and I wasn’t making highlights back then, so I’ve never been tested in this way before. However, until that happens, I am officially allowed to make Ben Simmons highlights. Officially. I play by my own rules.