Deandre Ayton 21 Points Full Highlights (3/9/2019)

My ability to write a coherent video description right now is severely compromised by the fact that I have a coupon sitting right in front of me which entitles me to a buy-one-get-one-free breakfast sandwich at a local fast food establishment. The power which that coupon confers to me is magnificent and intoxicating. To imagine that a lowly peon like myself would be granted the ability to buy one breakfast sandwich and receive another one at no cost, simply for filling out an online survey asking about my previous dining experiences, is nigh unimaginable!

However, with great power comes great responsibility. I have to make sure that I order the right breakfast sandwich because I will have to eat two of them. If I order something that is insufficiently tasty, I will have squandered the coupon. That is why I’ve been on the fast-food chain’s website for the past two hours taking careful notes on the pros and cons of each of their breakfast sandwiches. It is hard to maintain my focus while also making NBA highlight videos for my channel, but I’m doing my best here.

If this description sounds familiar, it’s because I recently opined at length about a buy-one-get-one-free large pizza coupon that I also have in my possession. Maybe I’m not cut out to be a coupon user. The power paralyzes me and leaves me unable to act.

I will say that DeAndre Ayton likely has no coupon-related stress in his life. Even on his smallish rookie contract, he gets more than enough money to spend on fast food breakfast sandwiches, even if he doesn’t have a coupon. If he makes the wrong breakfast sandwich choice, the only inconvenience is he has to order a different one, a luxury that us lowly knaves don’t have. I wonder if he’s taking friend applications? I would totally be his friend. I have coupons.

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