New money-making idea for the Hornets (since they can’t be making much money from ticket sales right now): P.J.’s PJ’s! Hornets-branded pajamas with P.J. Washington’s name on them! You can sell them in the pro shop at the arena for fifty bucks a pair.
You know these would sell well because basketball fans in general will buy all kinds of random crap as long as it’s branded with the brand of their favorite NBA team. The same bearded manchildren who buy the six-pack of Hornets-branded shot glasses and the Hornets-branded mini wall-attachable basketball hoop wouldn’t be able to resist the allure of luxurious plush pajamas in a bright teal color.
Selling these pajamas also opens up the possibility of “pajama parties”, where fans who wear pajamas to the game get discounted tickets. Or something. This idea’s not totally fleshed out yet.
[Ed. note: remember to put a joke here about Hornets games being so boring that people are going to sleep in their seats]
Since this is a legitimately good idea that makes 100% complete business sense, I’m gonna have to ask for royalties on the order of 50% of total sales of P.J.’s PJ’s. I also want Michael Jordan himself to autograph a set of pajamas for me and have it sent to me. That way I can be snug and comfy while making highlight videos. Also, it only makes sense for the GOAT of scrub-based highlight videos to wear clothes that were fondled by the GOAT of basketball (except Kareem is the GOAT).