Robin Lopez 18 Points Full Highlights (4/18/2017)

The Bulls, despite me (and their entire fanbase) never shutting up about how much they sucked throughout the year, are somehow up 2-0 on the top-seeded Boston Celtics. This is as baffling to me as I’m sure it is for you. I mean, I saw them quit halfway through the season. I saw it with…

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Paul Zipser 16 Points Full Highlights (4/18/2017)

I have discarded my old nickname for Paul Zipser, “The Zipper”. It was not a relevant nickname, because he basically doesn’t have any zipper-like attributes. He’s not especially fast (a zipper could be one who zips around really quickly), he doesn’t play especially great defense (a zipper could be a guy who zips people up),…

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Bobby Portis 19 Points Full Highlights (4/16/2017)

Bobby Portis was the reason the Bulls were victorious tonight. Bobby Portis won his team a playoff game. His first ever playoff game, and he, well, he didn’t exactly put his team on his back, but where would they have been without all his long jumpers? You can point to other players (player) on his…

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Paul Zipser Career High 21 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (4/12/2017)

Paul “The Zipper” Zipser will never live up to his nickname, which could either mean “a guy who’s fast” or “a guy who locks people up with his defense”. Speed can’t be taught and Zipser doesn’t have it; defense CAN be taught, but players with his attributes (okay you made me say it he’s WHITE…

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Jerian Grant 17 Points/11 Assists Full Highlights (4/10/2017)

Okay, now I REALLY regret wasting my time with those two “Jerian Grant 15 Points/5 Assists” videos. Those vids barely got any views in the first place, and now their view counts are locked in place for all time, because no one could conceivably ever want to watch them ever again. I mean, it’s not…

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Jerian Grant 15 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (4/8/2017)

Does the title of this video title seem familiar to you? It shouldn’t, because only 800 people watched my video from two days ago that showed Jerian Grant scoring the exact same amount of points and dishing the exact same amount of assists. If past performance is an indicator of future results, this video will…

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Nikola Mirotic 22 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (4/6/2017)

I think the hype for Nikola Mirotic took a permanent hit after he got benched a couple weeks ago. His hype levels were already kind of low for what kind of a player he is (the Euro kind), but the prospect of him never getting to play again have lowered them even further into the…

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Jerian Grant 15 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (4/6/2017)

The Bulls have too many point guards. The players know it, the FO knows it, the fans know it, everybody knows it. Rondo, Carter-Williams, Payne, Canaan, Grant. A whole lineup of PGs is possible for them, which should never be the case. So it makes sense that if Jerian Grant isn’t playing well, he isn’t…

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Bobby Portis 21 Points Full Highlights (4/2/2017)

Bobby Portis AKA Crazy Eyes Portis AKA Bobby Bitches has been the object of some consternation among Bulls fans. He never seems to perform well as a starter, the very times when his team needs him to step up, but he’s also inconsistent off the bench. It’s hard to blame all the Bulls’ problems on…

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Nikola Mirotic 28 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (3/30/2017)

It’s time for Nikola Mirotic to find another team. Yeah, he’s playing big minutes as of right now, but the Bulls have shown that they won’t hesitate to bench him/DNP him for no reason at all. At any moment, BAM, Mirotic could find his heinie superglued to the bench while Joffrey Lauvergne gets to play…

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