Kentavious Caldwell-Pope 20 Points Full Highlights (1/9/2015)

16 threes attempted, the most by any player this season. Are you serious? I know that the total was inflated by his seeming hotness at the end of the game. I know that. I’m not brushing it aside, like it don’t mean anything. But 16 threes? Only making 4? If there’s anyone on the Pistons…

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D.J. Augustin 26 Points Full Highlights (1/7/2015)

Alright, so DJ Augustin sucking to start the year was definitely because of Josh Smith’s opposite Midas touch. His struggles along with the struggles of his entire team were due to one player’s penchant for shooting bad jumpers. That was sarcasm. I’m not convinced that Josh Smith has much to do with the successes of…

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D.J. Augustin 19 Points Full Highlights (1/6/2015)

I was fooled. We all were fooled. I thought that DJ Augustin had turned a corner in his career and was going to be a good player from now on. He had some amazing performances with the Bulls after being left for dead on the Raptors. I thought the 3 million per deal that he…

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Andre Drummond 20 Points/7 Post Moves Full Highlights (12/26/2014)

I don’t know if this sudden explosion of back-to-the-basket proficiency and Josh Smith getting traded have anything to do with each other, but the timing is kind of funny. It has been known since the beginning of the season the SVG wants Andre Drummond to be a traditional post-up kind of center, and is willing…

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Kentavious Caldwell-Pope 20 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (12/21/2014)

Kentavious Caldwell-Pope, adorned in the papal Pallium vestment, entered the cathedral where mass was taking place. Coming in through the back, nobody took notice of him as he entered the rear of the sanctuary. The priest at the front was saying some kind of prayer. It was the perfect time to interrupt, as everybody else…

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Andre Drummond 19 Points/24 Rebounds Full Highlights (12/17/2014)

As I usually do before making a highlight video, I searched YouTube for Andre Drummond-related videos to see if one of my rivals had been stealing my views. I did not find such videos, but I found worse: TMZ Sports uploaded a video about Andre Drummond’s shoes. Are you kidding me? Sports themselves are already…

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Andre Drummond 23 Points Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

Poor Andre Drummond. The one time he makes a free throw, it actually turns out that it might have been better for him to miss it. A cruel turning of fate. He made it, though, and the Suns failed to get a shot, and the Pistons won, so it’s all good. I can’t imagine that…

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Greg Monroe 22 Points Full Highlights (12/9/2014)

In the interest of journalistic ethics, I must disclose something at the forefront of this description. Moose needed 22 shot attempts to score 22 points: the dreaded “Jordan Crawford” effect. A player who scores as many or fewer points than the amount of field goals they attempt rarely is having a positive effect on the…

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Josh Smith 23 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/6/2014)

We are almost a quarter of the way through the season, and Josh Smith is still shooting a mere 38% from the field. I won’t rip into Joshy here too much, since I know a lot of his fans will end up reading my words, but Christ, he needs to pick his shots better. Now…

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Kyle Singler 21 Points Full Highlights (12/6/2014)

I warned Kyle in my last description that he shouldn’t have any more good games. Apparently he doesn’t watch his own highlight videos, because here I am, making another Singler video. Even the mention of his last name catapults me into a whirling vortex of loneliness. “Singler”. That describes my life right now. Yesterday I…

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