Dirk Nowitzki 15 Points Full Highlights (3/8/2019)

Screw off with this “retirement tour” BS. It’s so corny. Luckily, for his part, Dirk Nowitzki seems slightly embarrassed by the whole thing. So I’m not blaming him (unlike how I’m blaming Dwyane Wade, FOH outta here with that jersey swap garbage) for people wanting to make a big show out of his retirement. Except…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki 15 Points Full Highlights (2/23/2019)

There are 23 games left in the regular season. Dirk Nowitzki needs 92 points to pass Wilt Chamberlain and secure 6th place in the career point total leaderboard (he also needs 191 to pass LeBron again, assuming LeBron dies right now and doesn’t rise again on the third day). The question on everybody’s minds: can…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki 14 Points Full Highlights (1/30/2019)

It took a long time, a really long time, almost two whole decades worth of time, but Dirk Nowitzki is finally slowing down. Last year he looked like he could go for a few more seasons, he wasn’t amazing or anything (unless you consider his age), but he was still good. Now, I feel like…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki 19 Points Full Highlights (3/20/2018)

The list of people who have assisted Dirk Nowitzki on a shot is undoubtedly really long, and full of really weird names. I would only be 50 percent surprised to find that Mark Cuban was on it. Kyle Collinsworth is definitely on it now, if he wasn’t before, which he probably was. I don’t know,…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki 23 Points Full Highlights (3/4/2018)

It’s a sad time to be living in when Dirk Nowitzki’s season high in points is just 23, considering that he played seven straight seasons where he averaged 23 points per game or more. Then again, it’s also a happy time to be living in when 39-year-old Dirk Nowitzki can continue to give us vintage…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki 18 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/2/2018)

Dirk Nowitzki is having the best three-point shooting season of his career. If that tidbit was too obscure for you, here’s another one: he’s really old. Those two facts are an unusual combo in the NBA. There was a point in his career, right around when I really started caring about the NBA, that he…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki 22 Points/1 Dunk Full Highlights (2/10/2018)

As of yesterday night, Kyle Collinsworth officially has a new entry to put on his resume: “-Assisted a Dirk Nowitzki dunk. Nowitzki was 39 years old at the time of the dunk.” You know you threw a good pass when Dirk, who barely dunks anything anymore because he can barely dunk, has no choice but…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki 21 Points Full Highlights (1/20/2018)

When Dirk Nowitzki heard his doorbell ring, he strongly considered not even getting up from his couch. It was only when he remembered that he had a large shipment of German meat products arriving soon, a shipment that he would have to sign for, did he slowly lift his tall body off the comfortable sofa…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki All 74 Fadeaway Jumpers Full Highlights (2015-16 Season Dirkilation)

Since learning of the free-agency curse which afflicted the Dallas Mavericks, due to the construction of the American Airlines Center defiling a 1600’s-era Catholic missionary, Dirk Nowitzki found that he could no longer sleep. His nights were restless, his days, groggy. Thoughts of the Mavericks’ free-agency failings persisted through any attempts to banish them, and…

Read More

Dirk Nowitzki All 126 Three-Pointers Full Highlights (2015-16 Three-ilation)

Dirk Nowitzki stealthily made his way to the furthest corner of the American Airlines Center. Here, there was a forbidden door; he opened it and proceeded down the stairs that were revealed to him: the stairs that led to the remnants of the old Spanish mission upon which the arena had been built. Dirk wandered…

Read More