Dwyane Wade 20 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (1/18/2019)

Since I know Dwyane Wade is reading this (Hi Dwayne!!!), I want to personally inform him that I am offering him, and him only, a one-time reduction in the cost of my boutique steroid treatments. The previous price was somewhere in the tens of thousands per treatment, but for today, and today only, Dwyane, you…

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Dwyane Wade 21 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (12/30/2018)

Is there a reason why the Heat can’t just make their “Vice” color scheme their permanent color scheme forever? It’s obviously a huge hit with fans (these jerseys are the best-selling in the NBA right now), and changing the team colors would symbolically shift away from the “big-three” era to the “just a bunch of…

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Dwyane Wade 25 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (12/8/2018)

Since the last time I gave my subscribers an update, I’ve made some upgrades to my home steroids lab in my bathroom that have resulted in a better product. The first thing I did was move the operation to my kitchen, since I didn’t have room in the bathroom for all the equipment. I originally…

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Dwyane Wade 35 Points Full Highlights (11/25/2018)

I’m not going to sit here and try and convince Dwyane Wade to not retire at the end of the season. It would be a wasted effort, for one because he’s said he’s definitely retiring and no one can tell him otherwise, and for two because there’s no way he’s reading the description for this…

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Dwyane Wade 19 Points Full Highlights (11/3/2018)

Dwyane Wade has been ‘roiding his whole career. Everybody knows this. If you need proof, just look at the comparison pics of his Marquette days versus his NBA days. People’s jaws don’t become square like that because they’re doing jaw exercises. It’s because they’re injecting large amounts of high-quality upmarket steroids. I’m not judging here,…

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Dwyane Wade 19 Points Full Highlights (10/30/2018)

Early returns on this season are that Dwyane Wade can shoot threes now. That’s good news now that he’s not as athletic as he once was; drives to the basket are both harder to accomplish and more hazardous to his health once he gets near the rim. Wade has always been a poor three-point shooter…

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Dwyane Wade 19 Points Full Highlights (10/27/2018)

“There’s been some kind of mistake,” the caller tells me. Just based on the urgency of the caller’s voice, and the timing of the call itself, the identity of the caller is clear: it is Dwyane Wade. “No mistake, Dwyane,” I answer coolly, leaning back in my luxurious office chair and propping my feet up…

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