John Henson 21 Points Full Highlights (2/25/2015)

You might expect John Henson to step into the role the Bucks have been grooming him for, now that Larry Sanders has chosen Kush over basketball. Not unreasonable to think that he could elevate his play and become the Bucks’ starting center of the future. It is not to be. Zaza Pachulia is not the…

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John Henson 14 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (1/31/2015)

I am in mourning. Nothing can console me, for I am far too deep in the waters of sorrow. John Henson’s post game was once so full of life; now it rests six feet under, its vitality taken by the cruel hand of Jason Kidd and his ruthless coaching staff. We must now be content…

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John Henson 11 Points/5 Blocks Full Highlights (12/29/2014)

John Henson has had five blocks in each of his last two games, both times playing around twenty minutes. Now the question is: does Jason Kidd disapprove of people on his team getting triple-doubles? Because Henson would get one fo sho if you played him forty minutes. Rebounds, points, and blocks. But let’s not stop…

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John Henson All 64 Dunks Full Highlights (2013-14 Season Dunkilation)

“Hello, welcome to Chipotle, what will you be having today?” The burrito constructor didn’t even look up at who she was addressing as she prepared her burrito-constructing station. “Let’s see, I think I’ll…” At the sound of the familiar voice the attendant looked up and smiled. “Oh, it’s you! Two steak burritos, extra guac and…

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John Henson 15 Points Full Highlights (4/11/2014)

If you’re the Bucks, and Ersan Ilyasova is out for the rest of the season with a made-up injury, who do you start at the power forward position? A.) Jeff Adrien B.) Khris Middleton C.) John “Gumby” Henson Most of us would answer C and laugh off the other two answers. John Henson is young,…

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John Henson 16 Points Full Highlights (2/10/2014)

At what point do we start becoming concerned that John Henson seemingly can’t do anything with his right hand? Why does he even bother doing that shoulder shake thing if everyone knows that he’s just going to go lefty every time? It’s like he worked so hard on developing his off-hand that his dominant hand…

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John Henson 20 Points/15 Rebounds Full Highlights (1/18/2014)

Congratulations John Henson! You win the “Best Player on the Worst Team” award! Every awful team needs to have a player who isn’t total garbage, and you are that player! You follow in the hallowed footsteps of such luminaries as Kevin Love, Brook Lopez, and Derrick Brown! Yes, times are sad for the Milwaukee Bucks….

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John Henson 18 Points/2 Blocks Full Highlights (12/20/2013)

The evil Dr. Exosphere rubbed his hands together eagerly. “Yes, yes…my creation is almost ready to be unveiled!” Inside the giant test tube, a humanlike form floated in a pseudo-placental fluid. “Just one more dose of the growth hormone, and he will be ready to take the court! Basketball domination will soon be in my…

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John Henson 20 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2013)

John Henson was pretty clutch against the Knicks. Game-tying putback with .3 seconds left? Sweet pea soup. But he was also pretty unclutch. Missing a potential game winning jumper? Eh, I guess the Bucks are tanking, so it’s cool. Of course, he should never, ever, be taking jumpers at this stage in his career. He…

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John Henson 18 Points/13 Rebounds/2 Blocks Full Highlights (12/14/2013)

John Henson slept fitfully, tossing and turning in his bed. Within the deepest confines of his brain, a dream played out its haunting plotline… ——————– From the fog emerged a dark, tall figure. The grey murk made it impossible to distinguish the man until he walked right up to John. “Wilt! Why are you here?”…

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