Michael Beasley 18 Points Full Highlights (4/14/2014)

Now that marijuana is legal in a few US states, everybody should apologize to Michael Beasley for ragging on him after he got caught smokin’ dat green. He just does it to relax, you know? Calm the nerves before the big game. How is it worse than Kirk Hinrich downing two twelve-packs and a fifth…

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Rashard Lewis 17 Points/4 Threes Full Highlights (4/9/2014)

Rashard Lewis is the guy I model my game after. I mean, the computer version of me. The real version models his game after Otis Birdsong and Purvis Short. But in any NBA 2K game, when it comes time to choose the shooting form of my dude, I choose Rashard Lewis’. They didn’t get it…

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Udonis Haslem 17 Points Full Highlights (3/28/2014)

“What will you be having?” “Gimme your 32 ounce porterhouse. I’m a hungry dude. Big game tonight. Sides of asparagus and mashed potatoes. And some mineral water.” “How would you like the steak cooked? Well done?” “No way man, actually…” The waiter cut him off. “Get it? WELL DONE! Because you’re frickin’ done! No way…

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Michael Beasley 16 Points Full Highlights (3/22/2014)

The Heat are continuing their strategy of not playing Michael Beasley to save him for the playoffs, letting him play decent minutes only occasionally to make sure he stays hot. At least, I think that’s what they’re doing. It’s hard to tell for sure. It fits in with the “Heat don’t really try during the…

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Ray Allen 25 Points/4 Threes Full Highlights (3/16/2014)

How many technical free throws can one guy hit in a game? What’s the record? Because 5 is a lot. Ray Allen is a great guy to have in those kind of situations. Which brings me to my next topic: that new delay of game rule. It messes me up. When I watch college basketball…

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Ray Allen 22 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/14/2014)

Prior to tonight’s game, Ray Allen was shooting almost exactly 40% from three on his career. Just a sliver over. If he had made 1/5 of a three less and it would be perfect. And with the volume of those shots that he’s taken over his career, that kind of efficiency is pretty amazing. Stephen…

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Michael Beasley 24 Points Full Highlights (3/4/2014)

I don’t get what went wrong with Michael Beasley. His first few years in the league were fine. Maybe not as amazing as people hoped after all the college hype, but fine. Then he got put in the doghouse in Minnesota and still hasn’t emerged. I know he’s a bit of an airhead and isn’t…

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Greg Oden 8 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (3/1/2014)

Am I the only one who can barely stand watching the Heat? But not because of the usual reasons why I can’t stand the Heat, like their football-snap opening or their dumb video-bombing. Or Dwyane Wade. But because I know, one day, I’ll be watching as Oden skies for a rebound and comes crashing down…

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Chris Andersen 18 Points/1 Three Full Highlights (2/18/2014)

Chris Andersen lay flat on his back. The dirt from the ground in his backyard was dirtying his already grimy shirt. He stared at the sky in wonderment. How had he never noticed before? Above him were birds. He didn’t know what kind they were, other than “the little ones that sit on power lines…

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Michael Beasley 16 Points Full Highlights (2/12/2014)

One of the minor storylines earlier in the year was the redemption of Michael Beasley. You all know the deal with Beasley and his problems (drugs), so I’m not gonna rehash it for you. But Beasley was having a great start to the year while shooting great percentages. But everyone knew that his hot start…

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