Ersan Ilyasova 27 Points/16 Rebounds Full Highlights (1/22/2013)

I try to do repeats as temporally separate as possible. Sometimes it doesn’t work out. Like when Ersan Ilyasova has two huge games in a row. 27 and 14 followed up by an even better 27 and 16. By the time the end of the season rolls around I’m gonna be doing “Ersan Ilyasova 27…

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Ersan Ilyasova 27 Points/14 Rebounds Full Highlights (1/19/2013)

Whenever I see Ersan Ilyasova play, my mind is filled with questions: “Has this guy ever been outside? Why does he look like he fell into a vat of off-white paint? Is he a mole-person? Is that why his real name is Arsen Ilyasov?” The jury’s still out on the mole-person thing, but one thing…

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Larry Sanders Career High 19 Points Full Highlights (1/17/2013)

While not leaving his puppies outside in the cold Milwaukee winter without food or shelter, Larry Sanders enjoys dominating people on the basketball court. His preferred method is to swat their shots out of bounds, but he is not afraid to dunk on their faces if the opportunity presents itself. He does more of the…

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John Henson 19 Points Full Highlights (1/13/2013)

John “Concentration Camp” Henson offers a glimpse into the life of a power forward with no power. I don’t know if there is a skinnier big man in the league. So what does he do? He uses a bunch of funky-looking hooks and floaters to score. Some say that he needs to bulk up a…

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John Henson 20 Points/3 Dunks Full Highlights (1/2/2013)

John “Inspector Gadget” Henson hasn’t gotten to play much this season. This is a total mystery to me considering how he apparently enters “beast mode” the instant his sneaker touches the court. The only explanation is that he is somehow behaving badly off the court. Possible infractions he’s committed: artificially enhancing his leaping ability using…

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Ersan Ilyasova 24 Points Full Highlights (12/30/12)

Ersan “Turkish Delight” Ilyasova has awakened himself from the doldrums that plagued him earlier in the season, and is returning to last year’s form. This is a good thing, because the Bucks need to showcase him for when they trade him to the Mavericks in a package for Dirk. In the interim, they need someone…

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Brandon Jennings 25 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (12/26/2012)

Two weeks ago, in the Buck’s contest versus the Brooklyn Nets, Brandon Jennings scored 26 points and notched seven assists. Last night, Jennings scored 25 and had six assists. Now, those are good numbers, but it doesn’t take a genius mathematician to see the disturbing trend in those numbers. Proposed video title a decade years…

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Brandon Jennings 26 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/9/2012)

Brandon Jennings scored 55 points in his 7th NBA game. That’s pretty nuts, considering he hasn’t scored more than 37 since then. Now he’s just an inefficient chucker who is also used as a benchmark for other crappy shooters. Like, “Kemba Walker is shooting worse than Jennings” or “John Wall is barely a better shooter…

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Larry Sanders Triple Double 10 Points/12 Rebounds/10 Blocks Full Highlights (11/30/12)

Larry “The Sandman” Sanders is known around the league primarily as a spastic shot-blocker who fouls a lot. It’s true: 7 fouls per 36, but also 4 blocks. Here he turns Pekovic and Love from ferocious wolves of the arctic forest into timid blanket-swathed puppies who quake in fear at Sanders’ flailing arms of fury….

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Ersan Ilyasova 18 Points Full Highlights (11/26/2012)

Ersan Ilyasova AKA The Ersanator AKA Turk Dirk AKA Arsen Ilyasov the 30-year-old Uzbek has sucked very bad so far this year. The internet is flooded with angry fantasy owners who expected the ILL-man to continue his production from last year, but instead got a pasty blob of inability. He can no longer shoot or…

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