Otto Porter 15 Points Full Highlights (4/21/2015)

Making the Raptors into his bitches Abandoning the goggles allows him to ball Yes, he is actually decent now Befitting a player picked third overall Everyone was down on him, including me Not Wizards fans, though, who always believed Otto Porter is blossoming before our eyes The tree of stardom grown from the potential seed…

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Otto Porter 17 Points/4 Dunks Full Highlights (4/3/2015)

Here’s a quick quiz for you. Leave your answer in the comments. No peeking at the answer sheet! Remember, if you get it wrong, I have the power to delete your YouTube account. What percentage of Otto Porter’s bustitude can be explained by Randy Wittman’s incompetence? a) 100 percent b) 50 percent c) 0 percent…

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Otto Porter 15 Points Full Highlights (3/29/2015)

Have you ever wondered which Washington Wizards players correspond to which Rocket Power characters? No? Well, I’ve planted the idea in your head now so you will definitely find the following list illuminating. Otto Porter = Otto Rocket Drew Gooden = Twister Kevin Seraphin = Reggie Rocket Marcin Gortat = Squid Randy Wittman = Raymundo…

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Otto Porter 19 Points Full Highlights (2/27/2015)

The highlight maker’s quandary: do I watch my team (extra credit to however can figure out which one it is), or make highlights for my legions of adoring fans? Factors to consider: I want to see Michael Carter-Williams play, there were 14 games tonight and lots of highlights to do, and is it even possible…

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Otto Porter Career High 21 Points Full Highlights (11/1/2014)

“Why do scrubs always go off on us?” comes the frantic yell of the collective fanbase any time a role-player scores more than twenty points. Their angst is understandable, but ultimately misguided; lots of role-players have good games every night, and they have to come against some other team. Teams that get burned repeatedly by…

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Otto Porter 13 Points Full Highlights (10/29/2014)

New seasons mean new chances for players who may have underperformed the previous year. Only a fool would cling on to results of past years, as if they were the sole predictor of future events. The truth is, changes in team composition, plus a myriad other factors, make NBA success very hard to predict. Always…

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Otto Porter 9 Points/1 Dunk Full Highlights (4/11/2014)

The Wizards’ plan is working out perfectly. They’re making the playoffs, and their secret weapon has yet to be unveiled. You may think Otto Porter is merely a bust who was a total reach in the draft, but the actuality is that he’s been told to perform poorly in order to surprise playoff opponents. 7th…

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Otto Porter 9 Points Full Highlights (4/2/2014)

On the surface, Otto Porter appears to be a bust of magnificent proportions. However, do not be so quick to judge! He missed training camp and the beginning of the season with an injury, robbing him of his chance to get acclimated to his team and the NBA as a whole. The Wizards’ rotation was…

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