Khris Middleton All 164 Midrange Jumpers Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Jumperilation Part II)

This is continuation of my OFFICIAL REASONS TO LOVE KHRIS MIDDLETON POWER RANKINGS. We resume the list at reason #8. 8. 50/40/90 CLUB Okay, so Middleton wasn’t quite in the 50/40/90 club (50% FG, 40% 3P, 90% FT), but he was literally as close to being in the club as it’s possible to get without…

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Khris Middleton All 164 Midrange Jumpers Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Jumperilation Part I)

Speaking not just as a Bucks fan but as a fan of the art of scoring, I love Khris Middleton. Is he my favorite player currently in the NBA? I have a lot of favorites so I can’t really say, but he’s definitely near the top of the list. There are just so many reasons…

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Michael Porter Jr. All 141 Field Goals Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Bucketilation)

OFFICIAL REASONS THAT MICHAEL PORTER JR. DIDN’T AVERAGE 15 PPG THIS SEASON POWER RANKINGS 1. Paul Millsap Paul Millsap ruined the Nuggets with the combination of his huge contract, his athletic decline, his statistical impotence, his skillset reduncancy with other members of the Nuggets roster, and with his overall ruinistic tendencies. And not only did…

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Pat Connaughton All 27 Dunks Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Dunkilation)

While it remains to be seen whether or not the Bucks will be given a chance to compete for the NBA championship that they looked poised to contend for (before COVID-19 plummeted the world into chaos), nobody can dispute that they were the best team in the NBA during the regular season. While the “best…

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Dillon Brooks 21 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2020)

OFFICIAL REASONS NOT TO MAKE THIS VIDEO POWER RANKINGS 1. 21 points is not all that many for Dillon Brooks, who has spent the better part of two months transforming himself into Bradley Beal 0.8 2. Nobody cares about Dillon Brooks, not even ‘Zlies fans, so nobody will watch it 3. This video is getting…

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Serge Ibaka 27 Points Full Highlights (3/9/2020)

Since I wore myself out writing some other descriptions tonight, I present to you my latest low-effort drivel disguised as semi-serious journalism: OFFICIAL FAMILY-FRIENDLY EUPHEMISMS FOR SERGE IBAKA’S “THINGY” POWER RANKINGS: 1. “Thingy” 2. “Pants Python” 3. “Sweatpants Snake” 4. “The Congolese Crusher” 5. “(Not-So-)Little Serge” 6. “The Pipe” 7. “Meat” [POWER GAP] 9001. “Cockle-Doodle-Doo”…

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Marcus Smart 29 Points Full Highlights (3/6/2020)

OFFICIAL REASONS WHY MARCUS SMART’S 29 POINTS DO NOT COUNT POWER RANKINGS: 1. Smart was 9-of-23 from the field and 6-of-15 from three (he was shooting too much is what I’m trying to say) 2. The Celtics lost, and, as everybody know, stats accumulated in a losing effort do not count towards anything other than…

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Donte DiVincenzo 19 Points Full Highlights (3/4/2020)

OFFICIAL NBA PLAYERS BORN IN DELAWARE POWER RANKINGS 1. Walt Hazzard. I’ve never heard of this dude, but he was a one-time All-Star scoring 24 PPG per game for the Sonics in the 67-68 season, their first season as an NBA franchise. There was a dude on that team named Plummer Lott. LOL (lots of…

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Danuel House 17 Points Full Highlights (2/11/2020)

OFFICIAL WAYS TO PRONOUNCE “DANUEL” POWER RANKINGS 1. “Dan-You-Ell”. Since I am an expert at English-language pronunciation, you can take my word for it that this is how House’s fist name really should be pronounced if following the rules of the language. It’s like Manuel with a D. 2. “Dan-Ooh-Ell”. Pretty close to correct, but…

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Tomas Satoransky 19 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (1/25/2020)

DownToBuck ate some funny shrimp for lunch and isn’t feeling too well right now, so he’s going to phone in this description by utilizing the tried-and-true “power ranking” format. If the low-effort nature of this video description bothers you, I direct you to the description for tonight’s Shabazz Napier triple-double, which had a very high-effort…

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