Austin Daye 22 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (3/24/2014)

Oh great. Just what the Spurs needed. Another really good bench player picked up for nothing from another team. There may have been some doubt before as to how many games they would win the finals in. Now that number certainly is four. Who is this great bench player? Jeff Ayres of course! Hold on….

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Matt Bonner 13 Points/4 Assists Full Highlights (3/14/2014)

It baffles me how you’re allowed to say “Red Rocket” on TV. I know it’s Matt Bonner’s nickname, but it is also a reference to the male organ. Is the joke that Bonner has a really big one? Or a small one? Or an especially red one? Or just that it’s funny to have a…

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Manu Ginobili 22 Points Full Highlights (3/11/2014)

Manu Ginobili lay on the chaise in his therapist’s office. The room was almost surreal in its typicality; bookshelves crammed with medical treatises lined the dark-stained walls, and a single window pointed out at a calm city street several blocks below. The therapist, too, was a stereotype; a man with a full head of gray…

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Manu Ginobili 24 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/8/2014)

Going in for a layup as he had done thousands of times before, Manu felt confident in his ability to make the shot. He couldn’t get a clear look at the identity of the defender, but it hardly mattered; he could shoot it over almost everybody. Feeling some significant contact on his arm, he hit…

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Danny Green 24 Points Full Highlights (3/4/2014)

Danny “Eggs and Ham” Green was the darling of the finals last year. Hitting threes like a maniac, blocking LeBron, what a story. At least until the Heat figured him out and he became useless. And it looks like the rest of the league has figured him out too, because he hasn’t been playing well…

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Patty Mills 29 Points Full Highlights (2/19/2014)

New candidate for stupidest catchphrase by a basketball commentator: “G’day mate!” when Patty Mills makes a particularly impressive shot. It doesn’t help that the already goofy sounding Spurs’ commentator’s voice is rendered even more goofy with the addition of a horrible faux-stralian accent. But can you really blame him for picking the lowest hanging fruit…

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Marco Belinelli 20 Points Full Highlights (2/10/2014)

Marco Belinelli sat on his couch, laptop in lap, glass of Merlot in hand. Directing his browser to youtube.com, he searched “marco belinelli, today”. He always liked to keep track of what people were saying about him on various social media sites. As usual, some unrelated stuff came up first. Random Spurs videos with him…

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Patty Mills 32 Points Full Highlights (2/8/2014)

Patty Mills sat behind the wheel of his rented SUV, parked inconspicuously in the parking lot of a strip mall in Lubbock, Texas. Astros cap on his head and sunglasses obscuring his eyes, he read the local paper with amusement. “BED BATH & BEYOND BANDIT STRIKES AGAIN!” Beneath this urgent, front-page headline was a picture…

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Patty Mills 18 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (1/24/2014)

Patty Mills, driving home from another successful practice, looked around curiously. He had been diverted from his normal route home by detours, and was traveling through a commercial area that he had never had occasion to visit. Suddenly, a large sign ahead grabbed all of his attention. It read: “BED BATH & BEYOND” Unable to…

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