Rudy Gobert All 235 Dunks Full Highlights (2016-17 Season Dunkilation)

“Monsieur Gobert! Monsieur Gobert! Your esteemed guest has arrived!” Rudy Gobert rolled his eyes at his bumbling, bespectacled butler. “If you weren’t such an intolerable fool, Remi, you would be able to take his coat and invite him in to the parlor without running to me for guidance.” “Yes, sir! Of course, sir! I will…

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Shelvin Mack 18 Points Full Highlights (5/8/2017)

From getting DNP’s earlier in the season to starting a playoff game where the aim was to avoid being swept, Shelvin “The Macksturbator” Mack has come a long way, but in the end, the sweep happened while he was at the helm. The Macksturbator played about as well as could be expected in this game;…

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Rudy Gobert 21 Points Full Highlights (5/6/2017)

Does anybody else get annoyed by the “PLAYOFF INTENSITY” fetishism that is displayed both on TV broadcasts and on the internet in general? Maybe I don’t like it when people display emotions since I myself am an emotionless semi-human, but the whole thing feels like its trying to ascribe more meaning to what is, like…

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George Hill 22 Points Full Highlights (4/28/2017)

OFFICIAL REASONS TO MAKE THIS VIDEO: -George Hill had a good game -If we’re being honest here, nobody else is gonna make it because nobody watches George Hill videos ever -Making NBA highlight videos is a sick obsession of mine -Floater/runner game on point -Not too many layups -George Hill only had three assists so…

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Joe Ingles 8 Points/11 Assists Full Highlights (4/23/2017)

“Joe…Joe…” Gordon Hayward croaked. “What’s up man?” Joe Ingles replied, raising his eyebrows at Gordon, who was lying on the floor of the locker room wrapped in towels like a mummy. “I’m not gonna make it,” Gordon said weakly, his eyes closed and his face pale. “It’s over for me. I’m done.” Joe chuckled. “Man,…

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Joe Johnson 28 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (4/23/2017)

By my estimation, exactly two out of twelve field goals made by Joe Johnson last night were set up by a teammate of his. The other ten were strictly the result of Johnson’s isoing tendencies, tendencies which have fairly earned him the nickname “Iso Joe”. With Gordon Haywards’ minutes being extremely limited due to food…

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George Hill 26 Points Full Highlights (4/21/2017)

I’m piloting a new online program tentatively called “Hill Shills”. How it works is I recruit unemployed males aged 18-25 from various message boards and gaming communities to spam George Hill-related comments on every NBA-themed video on YouTube. Video about LeBron James? There’s twenty dudes in the comment section saying “George Hill better than LeBum…

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Joe Johnson 21 Points/1 Game-Winner Full Highlights (4/15/2017)

This is Joe Johnson’s fourth highest-scoring game of the season. Combine that with his clutch shot at the end of regulation to avert overtime and snag the Game 1 Win, and you can only come to one conclusion: Iso Joe has STEPPED UP for the playoffs. He is EMBRACING THE SPOTLIGHT. He MAKES BIG SHOTS….

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Boris Diaw 19 Points Full Highlights (4/2/2017)

I didn’t really expect Boris “The Big Croissant” Diaw to be capable of a revenge game, but the tubby Frenchman must have had some unspent reserves of revenge residing in his glands because he just had an honest-to-god revenge game against the team that traded him last off-season. He did it in his typical slow,…

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