Bradley Beal Career High 37 Points Full Highlights (2/11/2014)

After years of bungled draft picks and wasted assets, the Wizards are finally starting to resemble a decent team. Given that it’s been “their year” for like half a decade I’d say it’s about time. John Wall is looking somewhat like the superstar point guard he was supposed to be. Nene and Gortat bring veteran…

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Kevin Seraphin 19 Points Full Highlights (2/3/2014)

Watch these highlights. Pretty impressive, yeah? Kevin Seraphin sure shot the heck out of the ball. Some nice offensive moves. But something seems to be missing. What could it be? Of course! There are no passing highlights! You know why that is? Because Kevin Seraphin doesn’t pass the ball. He is a black hole on…

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Marcin Gortat 19 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (1/20/2014)

Martell Webster, seated next to Marcin on the bench, decided it would be a good time to bring up his plans. “Yo Marcin, I know it’s your birthday today, so me and the guys thought we would take you out to a strip joint for some partyin’.” Marcin smiled happily. He hadn’t expected anybody to…

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Kevin Seraphin 18 Points Full Highlights (1/11/2014)

Strange night in Washington DC. Through two rain delays (typical DC infrastructure), the Rockets managed to gain a 25 point lead, which they then promptly gave up in the face of the apparently unstoppable Kevin Seraphin. The Wizards went up by 5, and then decided it was their turn to stop scoring entirely, and ended…

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Jan Vesely 12 Points Full Highlights (1/8/2014)

I’ve been watching too many Wizards games for my own good. Why do I subject myself to it? Because anything seems good compared to watching the Bucks. Anyway, I’ve noticed that the Wizards are making a concerted effort to play Jan Vesely. He’s always looked good in Summer League, even hitting jumpers, and apparently he…

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Bradley Beal 21 Points Full Highlights (1/7/2014)

Bradley Beal heard a knock at his door. He looked up from the letter he was penning in surprise. “Who could my visitor be? I am not anticipating the company of any of my friends. Perhaps it is that beggar Vesely, beseeching me for scraps from my table. What a detestable fellow that man is.”…

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Martell Webster 30 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (12/16/2013)

Type “Martell Webster” into the YouTube search box and the first thing it suggests for you is “Martell Webster dunk instead of 3”. This is a travesty. Yeah, it was a stupid play, but the past is the past. W-Mart is a totally different player now. One could even posit that he has fulfilled the…

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Kevin Seraphin 16 Points Full Highlights (12/14/2013)

The Wizards have pretty much given up playing Kevin Seraphin. Who can blame them? He’s a chucker who doesn’t draw fouls. He doesn’t pass the ball. He doesn’t play defense but somehow fouls a lot anyway. His one positive attribute, his scoring ability, is not even that good. Keep in mind that I am in…

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Trevor Booker 24 Points/14 Rebounds Full Highlights (12/13/2013)

Trevor Booker was fuming. So close to the win, only to have in snatched from his fingertips! The injustice of it was absolutely maddening. Sitting in the locker room post-game, he scowled at the floor, consumed with dark thoughts. Glen Rice approached him. “Hey Book, you wanna-” He was cut off by the intense hate…

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Trevor Ariza 27 Points Full Highlights (11/12/2013)

“Hey, Trevor, excited for the new XBox that’s coming out? I already got my preorder in.” “Naw man, I’m holding out for the PS4. I hear it’s gonna be tight. Graphics so good they’ll make your mind explode. While you’re playing with your little kiddy console in 720p I’m gonna be quickscoping noobs in glorious…

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