Dante “Crafty Pork” Cunningham was having a good night. He had just taken nine field goals in a game versus the Hornets, but not only that, he didn’t miss a single one. Not one. So sitting by himself in the little Moroccan restaurant near his place, enjoying a masterfully prepared plate of couscous, he was in a good mood. He decided to check out how the rest of the games around the league had turned out.
“The Bucks almost choked. The Eastern Conference is so weak,” he thought to himself. “Looks like the Spurs took care of business. Damn the Wizards suck. Come on Bobcats! They really miss my talents over there. Oh man, the Kings got spanked. Holy Jesus. Let’s take a closer look at that one.”
Dante scrolled down to the Knicks’ box score. He almost spit out his tajine. Amar’e Stoudemire – 21 PTS, 10 FG, 10 FGA.
“AMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR””””””””””””E!!!!!!”