Very little is going right for the Knicks this season. They are 2-5, have the slowest pace in the league, and Carmelo’s new nickname is “Slumpelo”. Calderon and Bargnani are both injured and euro. Amar’e still sees fire extinguishers in his sleep. The only bright spot, as far as I can tell, is that Iman Shumpert no longer fulfills either the nickname “Slumpert” nor “Dumpert”. We need a new nickname.
Shumperfect? Imancipation Proclamation? These are workable, but I feel like there’s something better out there. Maybe Shumpert doesn’t even need a nickname.