Larry Nance scrolled through the contacts list on his phone, up and down, up and down, trying to figure out which one of his numerous acquaintances would be able to help him. The hazy, bright late-spring morning outside his window only caused his yearning to grow, and he impatiently chose a name at the bottom of the list who seemed as good a candidate as any.
After several rings, Nick Young’s finally answered. “Hey Larry, what’s up?”
“Hey Nick, I was wondering…do you know how to ride a skateboard?” Larry hoped his question wasn’t stupid, but Nick really seemed like the kind of cool dude who would ride a skateboard in his free time.
“Yeah, I skate all the time,” Nick answered.
“Can you teach me?” Larry asked, feeling a little foolish for being so direct.
Nick sounded a little hesitant. “First things first. Are you sure you wanna learn how to ‘board, or did you just play too many of the Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater games?”
Larry’s eyes wandered over to where his brand-new unridden skateboard leaned against the wall, then over to his childhood PS2, which, right at this moment, was on the pause screen of the fourth Tony Hawk game. “That’s like the first thing I thought about. But I evaluated my motivations and I’m pretty sure this is what I want.”
This explanation was apparently enough for Nick. “Okay. Bring your stuff over to my place.”
“Cool man! Thanks! You’re the best!” exclaimed Larry excitedly, happy that it was so easy to find a willing instructor.
—
The two teammates stood in the alley behind the house, one still wearing pajama pants with no shirt, the other clad in knee and elbow pads, clutching a skateboard to his chest.
“Aren’t you gonna skate with me?” Larry asked, noticing that Nick did not have his skateboard with him.
“This is about teaching YOU how to skate. I already know how.”
“Yeah, but can’t you teach me better if you demonstrate, you know, the skateboard tricks and stuff?”
Nick rolled his eyes. “No.”
Shrugging, Larry set the wheels of the board on the ground. “So, what, do I just stand on it?”
“Right. Just stand on it and I’ll push you real slowly so you can get used to balancing on it and stuff.”
Larry gingerly set one foot on the board, where it seemed ready to roll out from under him. Then, convinced that the board would at least stay in place, he carefully lifted up his other foot and planted next to the other. After a few seconds of being stationary, he lifted his arms up in success. “I did it!”
Nick looked up from checking texts on his phone. “Okay. Now I push you.”
“Slowly,” Larry reminded, feeling Nick’s hands on his shoulder and thigh. When he felt himself begin to roll forward, he instinctively stuck out his arms to maintain his balance. This caused him to wobble despite only having rolled a few feet. For a brief second he thought he would fall off, but the board rolled to a stop with Larry still standing proudly on it.
“You got it! You got it!” Nick encouraged. “Now try to move yourself with your foot like in the video games.”
Larry again put one foot on the board, but this time, he gently pushed off the ground with the other. With much concentration he was able to get both feet in position, but this action caused him to lose what meager forward momentum he had managed to build up, and he rolled a few more inches before stopping.
Larry and Nick stared at each other. Finally, Larry spoke. “Rad.”
Nick gave the thumbs up and nodded.
—
Two days later, Nick and Larry stood on the edge of the concrete bowl. “Where’s your skateboard?” Larry asked. “I thought we were gonna ride together.”
“I forgot mine at home,” Nick replied shortly. “But I already rode it so much that I don’t even really like it anymore. Boring, you know?”
Larry accepted this explanation without complaint. He looked down into the bowl. “I’m nervous. Am I gonna get gnarly air, Nick?”
Nick looked slightly uncomfortable. “Yeah. For sure. I mean, probably. You’ll do great.”
“I haven’t practiced since you first taught me how,” Larry admitted.
“That’s fine,” Nick said. “Just stick the board over the lip of the bowl and get ready to drop in. Just like in the video games.”
Larry followed these instructions. “Just like in the video games. Just like Tony Hawk,” he whispered to himself, eyes closed. Then, he opened his eyes and took a deep breath. “Okay. Here we go.” He put his left foot on the front of the board and let his weight guide the board down the incline. It immediately rolled out from under him, causing him to hit the concrete face-first.
Nick scrambled down to where his friend lay clutching his face. “Your contract’s gonna get voided, man.”
“It hurts, Nick,” Larry moaned. “This was a bad idea. I don’t think you’re a very good teacher.”
“Probably not, since I don’t know how to actually ride a skateboard.” Nick replied. “But, hey, now at least one of us does.”
“Nick?”
“Yeah?”
“Shut up.”