Joe Ingles 19 Points/1 Injury Full Highlights (11/12/2018)

Was anyone else getting some serious Jesus of Nazareth vibes from this performance by Joe Ingles? I don’t know about you, but while watching the game after his return, it really felt like a Galilean Israelite from around 30 A.D. was walking around on the court, getting buckets. Well, bucket. He only hit the one after getting mummified.

For those unaware of standard Christian theology, Jesus died, and then was miraculously resurrected from his dead state by his father, God. That’s how the story goes, it’s up to you if you believe it or not. Remember, any eyewitnesses to this even have been dead for around 2000 years and for some reason they weren’t resurrected too so they could tell us how things went down.

Anyway, that resurrection tale reminded me of Ingles getting his eye gouged out, him falling to the floor as the eye spun wildly at midcourt, Georges Niang grabbing the loose eye and storing it in his shorts for safekeeping, not realizing that Ingles could still see through it so he ended up getting a real close view of Niang’s junk, and the team doctors shoving the now-sweaty eyeball back into the socket after recovering it from Niang, hoping that all the nerves and stuff would just reconnect like nothing happened, then wrapping his whole head in five rolls of medical tape dug out from the nastiest storage closet in the whole arena so that nothing more would pop out, which nothing did, even though Ingles went back on the court and continued leading his team to victory like he hadn’t just had a hugely traumatic medical emergency.

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