Ja Morant 26 Points/13 Assists Full Highlights (8/11/2020)

Sources from inside The Bubb are informing me that, immediately after this game concluded, Ja Morant pretended to go in for a fist bump with his teammate Dillon Brooks, but “missed” and socked him right in the face five times until he was unconscious. While this attack took place, he yelled, “Stop chucking bad shots and try to adapt to our team concept you worthless Marcus Thornton clone!” but the effect of the message was lost because Brooks was already laid out on the ground cold by that point. Grizzlies teammates nearby watched the attack unfold but did not make any effort to intervene. According to my sources.

I obviously don’t condone violence, but in my opinion, Morant’s pugilistic assault on Brooks’ face was completely justified. Morant is consistently the best player on the ‘Zlies, scoring efficiently while setting up his teammates. Brooks, meanwhile, has only one goal on the court: to chuck shots. That was fun and endearing for a little while, but in the heat of an intense playoff race, that sort of one-dimensional scoring mentality is not needed and certainly won’t be appreciated by your teammates.

There’s a saying that goes, “You can’t take the chuck out of the player, but you can take the player out of the game.” If coach Jenkins isn’t going to take that step, then the only recourse is to take Brooks out of the game by way of fists and a strictly-adhered-to concussion protocol.

Sources from inside The Bubb also tell me that multiple star players are schmoozing with Morant, trying to plant ideas in his head that he should go to a team where Brooks isn’t infecting everything with his cancerous chuckage. Not to alarm ‘Zlies fans or anything. This is just according to my sources, after all. But my sources are extremely reliable. Because my sources are me, drywalled in between two hotel rooms in the bubble with a gigabit ethernet connection, thousands of ultra-high-sensitivity microphones, and a cache of Pop Tarts that should last me at least two more days.

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