Patty Mills checked his reflection in the rear-view mirror one more time. Seeing that his blond wig had come slightly askew on the drive over, he adjusted it until it was perfectly in place. His lipstick had fared better, and was just as garishly red as it had been when he had applied it thirty minutes earlier.
Thankful that Manu’s Halloween party was taking place in a private residence rather than at some popular club or restaurant, Patty got out of his car and walked towards the front door, each step taken with extreme caution as he balanced precariously on his high-heels. He self-consciously tugged at his too-short pencil skirt, wondering how girls ever went out of the house looking like he looked.
Ringing the doorbell, he was soon greeted by a distracted Manu, who barely glanced at his newly-arrived guest before rushing off to prevent one of the rookies from getting his head forcibly dunked into the punch bowl.
“Man, what are you supposed to be? A Valley Girl?” exclaimed LaMarcus Aldridge, walking over to Patty costumed as an Angry Bird. “What’s with the cardboard things all over you? Are you a cyborg Valley Girl?”
Patty smiled as a few other teammates gathered, all trying to decipher the meaning behind his costume. “Think about it. Where am I from?”
“Austria!” yelled a visibly intoxicated Tony Parker. “No. Wait. Australia,” he giggled.
“What does Australia have to do with taping pink-colored cardboard all over yourself and crossdressing? Is that what passes for fun down there?” LaMarcus asked.
Patty was feeling a little frustrated. He thought his costume was fairly obvious. “No, we don’t crossdress. At least, not most of us. The crossdressing is part of the costume.”
Kawhi Leonard, who had been sitting by himself on the sofa and staring at the floor, smirked slightly. “Shrimp on the Barbie. Clever,” he deadpanned. “Because you’re dressed like Barbie and you’re covered with shrimp.”
“See, he gets it,” Patty said. “Next time I’ll just dress up as a video game character and try not to hurt your brains too much.”
“I thought it was funny,” Kawhi said. “Nobody even understands my costume.”
“You’re not wearing a costume,” Patty pointed out, taking note of his teammate’s plain outfit of shorts and a t-shirt.
Kawhi looked sadly at the floor. “See? Nobody gets it.”