Shake Milton 17 Points Full Highlights (8/20/2020)

Shake Milton went 6-of-18 from the field in this game. He had more field goal attempts than he had points, which violates the cardinal DTB rule: DO NOT MAKE A HIGHLIGHT VIDEO IF THE PLAYER IN QUESTION HAD MORE FIELD GOAL ATTEMPTS THAN POINTS SCORED. However, he has been granted what is known as the…

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Raul Neto 17 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (8/12/2020)

According to Kyle O’Quinn (who has never shown himself to be anything other than a reliable source of information), Raul Neto is the best Monopoly player on the 76ers. Al Horford, meanwhile, is the worst. These tidbits of knowledge are the exact trivia items I need in my life. What could lend more humanity to…

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Furkan Korkmaz 21 Points Full Highlights (8/12/2020)

While painstakingly crafting the thumbnail image for this video (a laborious process which sometimes takes up to 45 seconds), I noticed something: Furkan Korkmaz looks like a cartoon character. With his comically large hairdo which borders on caricature, his larger-than-average eyes, his strange lack of teeth, his pointed face, his dopy expression, and his picture-perfect…

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Kyle O’Quinn 9 Points/10 Rebounds/11 Assists Full Highlights (8/11/2020)

With fifteen seconds left in this game, and with just one point standing between him and the fabled, glorious lands of the triple-double, Kyle O’Quinn had the ball. All he had to do was make a bucket (or get fouled on a shot attempt, but good luck getting the refs to call anything other than…

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Alec Burks 23 Points Full Highlights (8/11/2020)

I’m currently reminiscing about Alec Burks’ surprisingly lengthy career and I just recalled how there was a stretch of seasons with the Jazz where Burks was never really healthy and was often missing extended stretches of games with some physical ailment or another. Honestly, at that time, I expected Burks’ career to be over; while…

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Raul Neto Career High 22 Points Full Highlights (8/11/2020)

The preferred method of watching this video is to unfocus your eyes and sort of gaze at the screen of your video-viewing device without actually looking specifically at it. If you follow these recommendations, you can pretend that the 76ers’ Raul Neto is one of the following players: -Steve Nash. Nash was known for his…

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Alec Burks 20 Points Full Highlights (8/9/2020)

In my last Alec Burks video description, which was written just two days ago, I had these words to say: “Now Josh Richardson is slumping hard but Burks is there to pic up the slack! This is exactly why they got him!” Boy, do I look foolish now or what? Josh Richardson broke out of…

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Alec Burks 22 Points Full Highlights (8/7/2020)

Remember when Alec Burks was on the Warriors as their de facto #1 scoring option? That seems like so long ago. Like it happened in a different reality, almost. Things were so innocent back then. If you had combined the words “NBA” and “bubble” in a sentence, people would have thought you were talking about…

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Ben Simmons All 98 Dunks Full Highlights (2019-20 Season Dunkilation)

Sitting in the empty bleachers with a basketball sitting inertly between his feet, Ben Simmons idly browsed his phone. He knew he was supposed to be grateful that the 76ers had lined up an empty gym, completely free of COVID-19, for him to practice in, but he just couldn’t work up the motivation to actually…

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Shake Milton 20 Points Full Highlights (3/5/2020)

I feel like 76ers fans have major beefs with pretty much every player on their roster. Ben Simmons: Can’t shoot, won’t shoot, will ignore pleading of coaches and teammates for him to please, please, please shoot the ball Joel Embiid: Inexplicably disappears in important games, Al Horford: Huge waste of money, old, can’t shoot, can’t…

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