I thought I was going crazy. I had already checked myself in to the mental asylum and everything and was settling down in my padded room, preparing to live out the rest of my life surrounded by similarly-afflicted crazies like in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest or something. The reason for my assumed mental breakdown? I was pretty sure that Ed Davis once had a fairly reliable midrange game going, back in his Raptors and Grizzlies days. But now it seems to be abandoned totally, excised from his game in favor of layups and dunks. And players don’t just get rid of their midrange games if it’s working for them, which I’m pretty sure it was for Ed “Not Deyonta” Davis.
Basketball-reference is the website that clutched the shirt of my sanity and prevented me from toppling over the cliff of madness. It turns out that I was right about the nature of Ed’s game. Around the time he got to Los Angeles, he turned into a power foward version of DeAndre Jordan, shooting 60% the field while rarely attempting a shot outside of the paint. That’s cool that he wants to be efficient, but DownToBuck wants to see jumpers. Lots of them. From everywhere on the court. Layups are lame.
So now I’m actually still in this asylum and I’ve begged the nurse to let me out because I’m cured, but apparently I signed away my right to make decisions about my own status as a nutcase. I have to get a family member to come get me out. The thing is, none of them know I’m here, and I don’t really talk to them very often, so I don’t know their phone numbers. They also won’t let me log on to Facebook (I built an encrypted VPN tunnel to connect to YouTube though). So, if anybody in my family sees this, which they won’t because they don’t know about my sick NBA highlights channel, please come get me out of the asylum. It was silly of me to assume that I had lost my marbles just because of Ed Davis’ mysteriously vanishing midrange jumper. These crazy people are starting to bug me with all their weird habits and behaviors. If I have to stay here much longer I really will go crazy and then they really won’t let me out even if the opportunity arises.
Help.