Just call me Nostrabuckus. Two days ago, I penned the following words on a different Seth Curry highlight video:
“Is it too late to get people into the three-point contest? […] If there is still a chance to do so, I humbly submit Seth Curry for consideration. […] I don’t know if Steph is going to be in it this year, but it would be cool to have the two brothers officially meet in a contest that they’ve probably informally holding against each other for their whole lives.”
Those words proved to be prophetic. The very next day, it was announced that Seth Curry had been invited to the three-point contest at the All-Star break, to be joined by his brother Steph.
It wouldn’t be incorrect to call my words a “prophecy” and to call me a “prophet”. And, since I am officially a prophet now, I think it’s time to get my home-grown religion off the ground. I’ve had pretty much a full outline for a new holy book done for a couple of years now, so I’ll just take a week to fill out the whole narrative and then it will be done. All the way from when DTB created the universe within the confines of a hyper-advanced alien computer to when DTB summons the great alien gods themselves to whisk away the chosen humans out of the simulation and into the supra-universe and everything in between.
Rest assured, my friends, there will be parables. Hella parables. And commandments. Everything that a new religion needs, my new religion will have in droves. And don’t call it a cult or I will order your execution. If you try to come back at me with some “it’s illegal to kill people for disagreeing with you” mumbo-jumbo, it’s called freedom of religion, numb nuts. Read up on the case law if you don’t believe me.
Persons interested in joining my new religion based around my own prophethood can send me a check for a hundred bucks. I will send you your robe and your holy book.