When ESPN deigned to show us what we signed up for instead of full-screen shots of Dell and Sonya Curry getting interviewed by an insufferable Doris Burke for half an hour, quite an exciting game happened. Not as exciting as pondering the possibility that Seth Curry and Stephen Curry are somehow related, or talking about that possibility, or showing their parents reacting to every single god-damn thing that either of them did for the whole game, though. Here’s my advice for ESPN: instead of showing the game next time, just show some sort of slapped-together 30-for-30-esque documentary thing about the Curry’s. Don’t even talk about the game going on, and definitely don’t show even a clip of it, unless it’s something that one of the Curry’s did. Even then. Don’t want to let something that maybe happened in-game to interfere with the narrative being crafted.
Seth (henceforth referred to as just “Curry” [Update: I didn’t refer to him by name again in this paragraph]) had a pretty good game in this one after a disappointing series opener. He hit some shots, and hit maybe the biggest shot of his career with a minute left to put the Blazers up by one. It didn’t matter, because they frittered away their remaining possessions without even letting him shoot again (even though he had proven to be the most clutch player on the team at that point in time) while the Warriors got two easy buckets, but it was still a very impressive shot by a guy who isn’t used to taking them. Even when he was one of the better players on that Mavericks team a few years ago, I don’t think he was the one they were going to to get late-game buckets.
You might notice that the video title contains “4 Steals”. That’s right: I actually showed steals for once, even if these ones are somehow even lamer than usual because none of them directly led to points. Here’s my confession: I showed these steals because all four of them were Curry on Curry violence. You could tell that Seth was locked in defensively on his brother, and I’m trying to cash in on the rivalry by showcasing that. I’m no better than ESPN, blatantly playing up storylines for YouTube views. I’m sorry.