I think I’m properly applying the term “irony” when I note the irony of the Washington Wizards commentators talking about how Johnathan Williams is “finally looking comfortable”, given that Williams, as of this morning, has been waived by the team. That’s right. After playing twenty MPG per game in six games for the ‘Zards, starting…
Read MoreDay: January 5, 2020
Georges Niang 15 Points Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
I wouldn’t call this three-point shooting display “blistering” or even “scorching” (and I have those adjectives in the correct order, since getting blistered is more painful than getting scorched). However, I would call it “hot”. Georges Niang was hot from three. I don’t think that’s an unfair description of the temperature of his shooting, given…
Read MoreSerge Ibaka 21 Points Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
Ever since Stephen Jackson made one dumbass tweet a while back, I’ve been pronouncing Serge Ibaka’s name incorrectly in my head: “Serg Aybaka”. When I do have occasion to say his name out loud, I have to fight the urge to pronounce it wrong. One day I’ll screw up and everybody will think I’m a…
Read MoreP.J. Washington 19 Points Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
It’s gotta be official now that P.J. Washington is the most beloved Charlotte-based P.J. of all time, ahead of P.J. Hairston and P.J. Brown, right? Can we make that official? Does a Hornets fan want to weigh in and add some officiality to the proceedings? P.J. Washington being more beloved than P.J. Hairston was a…
Read MoreAlec Burks 27 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
I put off making this video as long as possible, but I could put it off no longer. On the surface, Alec Burks scoring 27 points is an eminently highlight-worthy performance that should be compiled as soon as possible. But lurking just below the surface is a fact that is currently causing me great anguish:…
Read MoreDarius Garland 20 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
The Cavaliers’ aptly-named “Young Inefficient Tunnel-Vision Midget Chuck Bros” tandem actually had a pretty good game tonight! Collin Sexton put up 30 (along with a whopping 2 assists, which is a large amount considering that when he has the ball he is literally incapable of seeing anything other than the rim), and Garland had 20…
Read MoreOmari Spellman Career High 23 Points Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
I’ve taken to calling Omari Spellman “Spelldude” since he just looks like the kind of dude who would be pleased if you called him “dude”. In general, I feel like big, round guys are “dude” types, and Spellman is as big and round as they come. Also, I think there’s a pokemon with the word…
Read MoreDillon Brooks 22 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
Darn it! I thought for sure that Dillon Brooks would be leading the ‘Zlies in total field goals attempted, but when I went to check, he’s in second place. He’s attempted 460, while Jaren Jackson Jr. (total chucker by the way) has taken 470. There goes my whole narrative. I had a whole narrative of…
Read MoreJaren Jackson Jr. 24 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
OFFICIAL DTB POLICY UPDATE: I am now using the “Jr.” part of Jaren Jackson Jr.’s name in the titles of videos depicting Jaren Jackson Jr. I don’t know why I wasn’t before, because unlike a lot of dudes with a “Jr.” added on their name, Jackson’s actually adds pertinent information. His dad, Jaren Jackson, played…
Read MoreTerrence Ross 24 Points Full Highlights (1/4/2020)
I don’t know if I could tell you what my “perfect” or “dream” highlight video would be, but this video is approaching it. Terrence Ross does nothing in this video but hit jumpers or get fouled while attempting jumpers. In total, he hits seven, count ’em, SEVEN pull-up midrange jimbos. I’m getting shades of that…
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