“Dear Diary,
I can’t believe it. That rookie from France has had another good game. I tried so hard to destroy his confidence and prematurely end his career with my unfair treatment of him, but now, when I have no choice but to give him minutes, he plays like a ten-year veteran.
I don’t even know where France is. Wherever it is, I never want to go there. I have heard bad things about it. Somebody told me Sekou was born in Guinea, but I know that’s wrong because Guinea doesn’t exist. That’s not even a country. At least France is a country.
Every day I plead with Tom Gores and Ed Stefanski to please trade Sekou to anywhere for anything. If he would just get traded, then I wouldn’t be forced to give him minutes. I even went so far as to impersonate Ed on a phone call with the Suns, but they figured out who I was and then hung up the phone. That’s not fair. All I was asking for in return was Frank Kaminsky and a second round pick.
My hope now is that Sekou naturally worsens as a player so that the fans grow to hate him. If their hate for Sekou matches my own hate for that repulsive young man, then it would be easy to bench him forever and give all his minutes to Langston without receiving any backlash from the fanbase. To further this aim, I have told certain players on the team who I feel are trustworthy that they should never pass the ball to Sekou. When Pistons fans see that Sekou is not scoring anymore, thanks to being frozen out of the offense by the pro-Casey contingent of the locker room, they will turn on him. He will go from fan favorite to #1 scapegoat. Of this I am sure. All memories of his poster dunk, which wasn’t even good, will be erased from their collective minds.
At least Khyri is reliable in his awfulness. That is my only solace in these dark days.
Thanks for listening, Diary.
-Dwane”