I guess this is what Eric Gordon is on the Rockets for. If James Harden is playing like a collection of pubes (a bigger collection of pubes than the one attached to his chin), then Eric Gordon can theoretically step in and replace 50% of Harden’s production and 33% of Harden’s playmaking. I say “theoretically” because Gordon, at least pre-injury and pre-surgery Gordon, wasn’t really capable of replacing any amount of Harden’s production. If Harden was being a brick machine, Gordon would come in and also be a brick machine, and then you’ve got Russell Westbrook who also can be a brick machine. That’s a lot of bricks. With all those bricks you could build a new elevated expressway to the Rockets arena so that fans could actually get there without enduring four hours of bumper-to-bumper traffic.
Harden sucked a big dingaling this game with a sad 3-of-13 shooting effort which featured him missing all six of his three-point attempts. But Gordon stepped cleanly and confidently into the void left by Harden’s mysterious dingaling-suckage, and the Rockets were still able to pull out the win. Westbrook’s 45/6/10 line was ostensibly the more impressive line, but given how unreliable Gordon has been this season, I’m thinking his 27/5/3, which is indesputably his best line of the season, is the real story of this game.
Now, if only he could do something about the unsettling roundness of his head. It’s just so round. It’s too round. I look at it and I get tricked into thinking he’s a basketball.