“Dear Diary,
Today before the game coach Mike came up to me and told me that I would have to be a “fokill point” of the team because James and Russ weren’t playing. I wanted to ask him what that meant but I didn’t want to look stupid, so I just nodded really serious and said I could be the fokill point. Coaches like it when you take things serious.
The game went really well and I scored 21 points! It was fun playing with Eric and Danuel because they pass the ball. Beard Man only passes the ball after he dribbles it for a long long time. Sometimes I want to go up to him and tell him that we’re a team and that he should play different, but he would probably make fun of me like when he asked me if I was a virgin and I said “yes”. He laughed a lot when I said that. Later I asked Tyson what a virgin is and he said he would explain it later.
After the game we went to a nightclub, which is sort of like a big birthday party for adults, except it’s nobody’s birthday and there’s no cake. I was afraid there would be girls there that wanted to kiss me, which is gross, but Tyson said that in Utah none of the girls want to kiss boys unless they’re married. I guess that’s good. I wonder if one day maybe I’ll get married. On Google you can look up pictures of married people, which I do sometimes and then I imagine what it’s like.
I hope Beard Man and Russ get traded so that I can play good like this in every game. I called daddy and said he should trade for them so they can go to Los Angeles and he laughed and said he would if he could. I don’t know why he can’t. I got traded a bajillion times so why can’t Beard Man and Russ get traded?
That’s all for now, Diary.
-Austin”