Are you ready for a “vintage” Elfrid Payton performance? No you are not. You might think you are, but you aren’t. No one is. Because this is just WAY TOO MUCH Payton. Just like all those gigantic triple-doubles he had in Orlando, and in Phoenix (who even remembers the Payton era of Suns basketball?), and in New Orleans, this triple-double is an utterly unreasonable amount of Payton.
Unless you are a heavily outfitted, seriously prepared, seasoned highlight-video viewer, I recommend that you just pass this one by. Read the description, heed these words, and move on with your life while you still have it. Even the aforementioned hypothetical viewer, who has weathered one or two Payton triple-double vids before, should exercise extreme caution. I don’t want to be responsible for any deaths here. And believe me: death is what will result if you go into this like it’s a Zion Williamson vid or something. This is not for casuals.
It’s so intense that I had to have my tubby little kitty, Japurri Purrker, help with the compilation of this vid. He is immune to the affects of overhighlighting, and he’s seen me make tons of vids before, so I just perched him up on the desk and let him go to work. I don’t know if he knows all my shortcuts that make splicing and arranging clips super quick, but it only took him a few minutes and out came this video. I haven’t actually watched it yet, but I assume it’s all good. He’s a smart kitty. And tubby. And little.
Note: I am not at all surprised that this is the first triple-double that a Knicks player has gotten this season. The triple-double revolution, brought to the NBA by Russell Westbrook, is in full swing, but it seems to have passed the Knicks by. Who else is even capable? Julius Randle if he starts statpadding for assists, he’s done it before I think. Other than that, hoo boy. I’d love to see a hypothetical Reggie Bullock triple-double. That would be a way more watchable video than this.