https://youtu.be/5WhHb4pnklQ
In honor of Kyle Anderson’s newly-minted career high, which completely blows past his previous career high of twenty and makes it almost all the way to thirty, I will revisit the things that I said in my previous video description for him (written two days ago: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBEP8wGrVAo) to see how prescient I really am. (Note that my opinions are always correct, so if I ever write anything that appears to be “wrong”, that’s just an error in your interpretation. [Subnote: this is also a stress-free way to scrutinize holy texts.])
“Can you believe that Kyle Anderson’s career high is only twenty points?” My incredulity at Anderson’s low career high was completely justified, as you now see. I, and I alone, could see the scoring potential contained within Anderson’s point-production glands, and that potential has now, finally, manifested itself.
“It’s not like he’s the most pitiful scorer ever.” He’s actually the opposite of pitiful. Let me consult the internet to determine what the antonym of pitiful is so I can type it here.
“This is his fourth time scoring twenty, and I’ve given up hope that he will ever score more than that.” You may assume, from this sentence, that I had given up on Anderson after seven years of watching his utter point-production impotence. You assume wrongly. This sentence was written for comedic effect. I would never, ever give up on Kyle Anderson, and your implication that I would is deeply insulting to me.
“Is there any player in the league who is more under control than Anderson?” No, there is not. If there was such a player, their movements would be so slow that they would actually be traveling backwards through time, in complete disregard of Einstein’s Special Theory of Relativity.
“Kyle Anderson, as they say, have it all.” This was true before, but it is even more true now. Kyle Anderson have it all. Especially when “all” is taken to include a ludicrously expansive forehead.