https://youtu.be/M8CLrfubsBk
I’m looking around right now, and I’m wondering where all the people who were saying “Jakob Poeltl can’t score” went? There were so many of them, constantly harassing me with proclamations like “Poeltl can’t make layups anymore” and “His range is arm’s length” and “I only comprehend basketball on the simplest level and the nuances of the game are totally lost on me because I have the IQ of a housecat”.
That last one was VERY offensive to my tubby little kitty, Japurri Purrker, by the way. Please cool it with the discriminatory and prejudicial remarks.
Anyway, yeah, where did all those folks go? One moment they were there, disturbing my well-earned peace with their ill-considered blabbering, and the next they were gone, poof, just like that. The second Poeltl hit 20 (a career-high for him, by the way, if you couldn’t tell by the video title), it seems like. Does anyone know where they went? Did they crawl back to their disgusting mud-hovels to resume their normal life of soiling themselves and grunting? Did they choose a new player to be totally wrong about and find a new highlight-maker to torment? All I know is I’m checking my surroundings 360 degrees and all I see is Japurri taking a nap in a sunbeam.
Japurri taking a nap doesn’t mean he forgives them for their mean comments about the intelligence of cats. It just means that he’s using his dreams to practice the exact methods of his revenge. He’s a good kitty. Tubby, but good.
Oh well. It’s a mystery we’ll have to solve later. The truth of the matter, as we can very clearly see in this video, is that Poeltl CAN score, it’s just that he doesn’t usually feel like it. Because he understands that basketball played at the NBA level isn’t all about scoring; it’s about putting your team in a position to win. And for Poeltl, that means letting his slightly inferior teammates do more of the scoring while he focuses on making sure LaMarcus Aldridge never sees the court again, ever.
One thing he definitely CAN’T do, though, and likely will never be able to do, is shoot free throws. Am I the only one here who feels literal pain when he does his pathetic garbage one-handed push abomination at the line? It’s so ridiculous, I can’t believe that a Popovich-led coaching staff would even let him keep doing that. You wouldn’t even need a real shooting coach to start fixing that; anyone who has ever shot a free throw normally in their life could come in there and give him some pointers. Pointer number one: use both hands, idiot.