https://youtu.be/OoVWddR62Zs The Magic’s long-term plans are both very clear and very unclear at the same time. The very clear part is that they’re tanking and trying to rebuild through the draft. You know this is the case because they traded all their best players for scraps and picks. The dismal “core” of Nikola Vucevic, Evan…
Read MoreMonth: May 2021
Frank Jackson 25 Points Full Highlights (5/1/2021)
https://youtu.be/FtHWjB1FM1A While I was making this video, half of my brain was focused on the minutiae of actually doing proper editing for all these clips, and half of my brain was thinking about how I could make Bob Ross jokes in this video description. And actually there was another half of my brain that was…
Read MoreDoug McDermott Career High 31 Points Full Highlights (5/1/2021)
https://youtu.be/PEAQUi2iJ-s We were robbed of a potential 40-burger from Doug McDermott due to the disgusting and blatant tanking of the Oklahoma City Thunder. Al Horford is fine, dammit. Just put him in the game. Where’s Adam Silver? Isn’t he supposed to be protecting the integrity of the game? Because there was nothing integritous about this…
Read MoreMoritz Wagner 24 Points Full Highlights (5/1/2021)
https://youtu.be/xR–Yd1q76w The more I think about it, the more I really like my prospective nickname for Moritz “Der Gotterdammerung” Wagner, “Floppy Disk”. We can retire the “Der Gotterdammerung” nickname, because you plebs are too dumb to grok the FULL meaning of it. You cultureless swine. You disgust me. “Floppy Disk” just sounds really cool. Got…
Read MoreCole Anthony 26 Points/1 Game-Winner Full Highlights (5/1/2021)
https://youtu.be/y0PmkvPVnuw The Orlando Magic had made a habit of trotting out the basically the same lineup, year after year. Nikola Vucevic, Aaron Gordon, Evan Fournier, a big three of pretty good players. But there was no one, literally NO ONE, at all, anywhere, on this planet or any of the other gajillions of planets floating…
Read MoreTyrese Haliburton 24 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (4/30/2021)
https://youtu.be/0dUpTqRbyPA If Malcolm Brogdon can win ROTY of the Year, why not Tyrese Haliburton? The comparisons are there: -Both were NBA rookies, which is a requirement for winning ROTY of the Year unless you’re Ben Simmons -Both were contributing SUPER SOLIDLY to their respective teams’ efforts even if their raw stats weren’t eyepopping -Both have…
Read MoreAaron Nesmith 16 Points Full Highlights (4/30/2021)
https://youtu.be/V3ILDndzPxA Everyone’s gonna get all hyped up for Jayson Tatum scoring 60 points in the Celtics’ comeback from a 32 point deficit. I don’t even need to check the social medias right now; I know that there are tons of people, ranging from the most learned NBA scholars to the basest disgusting casuals, extolling the…
Read MoreLonnie Walker 24 Points Full Highlights (4/30/2021)
https://youtu.be/kskHFxGijMY OFFICIAL REASONS WHY THE SPURS LOST THIS GAME DESPITE BEING UP BY 32 POINTS POWER RANKINGS 1. Gregg Popovich isn’t even a good coach, and teams without good coaches tend to give up huge leads like it’s no big deal. (Note: this opinion, unlike some of the others espoused in these power rankings, is…
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