What the heck? I’m looking at the Pistons roster right now. As I type these words. I’m looking at it, and I’m wondering why the heck there aren’t any changes to it? Where are the new names? Why are all the old names still there? It’s not like the Pistons have a championship core right…
Read MoreLou Williams 27 Points/7 Threes Rockets Debut Full Highlights (2/23/2017)
The sound you just heard was Rockets fan collectively soiling their undergarments with jizz. Not the most pleasant sound in the world, right? Kind of a grunt-sigh mixed with the sound of chili being messily ladled into a bowl. UHH-uhhhhh. Splort splop. Ooooohhhh. Moving on. Lou Williams set a high bar with this 7-triple performance….
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 12 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (2/23/2017)
I watched a bunch of this game, because it was the first game to start after the way-too-long All-Star break. I was desperate, what can I say? I didn’t care that it was two mediocre teams mediocrely mediocring each other. I had to watch. I needed to watch. And here’s what I saw: Terrence Ross…
Read MoreZach LaVine All 36 Dunks Full Highlights (2016-17 Season Dunkilation)
Zach LaVine stared at the ceiling of his room in the hospital, his boredom so acute that he almost wished that he could have another surgery just so the anesthesia would knock him out for a few hours. There was simply nothing to do here. The TV above his bed only served to remind him…
Read MoreDTB’s Official NBA Power Rankings (Week 16) – TRADE DEADLINE EDITION
This week’s biggest busts: Mavericks -5, Pacers -3, Hornets -3, Trail Blazers -3 This week’s biggest successes: Timberwolves +5, Bucks +4, too many teams +2 1. Golden State Warriors (47-9, 1-1 this week) (last week: #1 [3-0] +0) Ideally the Warriors would trade for a center who meets the following criteria: 1. can jump 2….
Read MoreBobby Portis 19 Points Full Highlights (2/16/2017)
The All-Star break is upon us at last. No Bobby Portis involved, as far as I can tell, but that’s okay. He probably didn’t deserve that replacement spot over Carmelo Anthony, and he probably would have been a Darrell Armstrong-level in the dunk contest. So it’s all good. Bobby Bitches can take a week off…
Read MoreOtto Porter 25 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (2/16/2017)
Otto Porter is still leading the league in three-point percentage. Things haven’t changed. Kyle Korver is catching up, and may surpass him by season’s end, but it doesn’t matter. Everyone knows Korver can shoot. That’s what he’s good at. That’s what he’s supposed to do. Alternately, shooting, prior to this year, wasn’t one of the…
Read MoreGary Harris 22 Points Full Highlights (2/15/2017)
I am #hypedforgaryharris but I don’t feel like the rest of the world is following suit. They are #hypedfornikolajokic at about ten times the rate of Gary “Hairy Garris” Harris. This hype discrepancy is regrettable but understandable at the same time: Harris’ ceiling is a twenty-point-per-game scorer who doesn’t do a whole lot else. Sort…
Read MoreSpencer Dinwiddie 19 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (2/15/2017)
I have a proposal for the lame-os who do commentary for the Brooklyn Nets: whenever Spencer “Din-Dins” Dinwiddie does something cool or exciting, yell “IT’S DINNER TIME!” I can’t believe I have to come out and say this myself when it is such an obvious line to use. I swear. They can come up with…
Read MoreKhris Middleton 20 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (2/15/2017)
If the Bucks can’t have Jabari (sources tell me he’s on vacation; I wonder when he’ll be back?) at least the Bucks can have Khris Middleton. And not just any Khris Middleton: they get the “diamond dimes” version of Khris Middleton, the version that dimes teammates non-stop with his unexpectedly solid playmaking ability. Throw that…
Read More