Dirk Nowitzki is having the best three-point shooting season of his career. If that tidbit was too obscure for you, here’s another one: he’s really old. Those two facts are an unusual combo in the NBA. There was a point in his career, right around when I really started caring about the NBA, that he…
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Dirk Nowitzki 22 Points/1 Dunk Full Highlights (2/10/2018)
As of yesterday night, Kyle Collinsworth officially has a new entry to put on his resume: “-Assisted a Dirk Nowitzki dunk. Nowitzki was 39 years old at the time of the dunk.” You know you threw a good pass when Dirk, who barely dunks anything anymore because he can barely dunk, has no choice but…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki 21 Points Full Highlights (1/20/2018)
When Dirk Nowitzki heard his doorbell ring, he strongly considered not even getting up from his couch. It was only when he remembered that he had a large shipment of German meat products arriving soon, a shipment that he would have to sign for, did he slowly lift his tall body off the comfortable sofa…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki All 74 Fadeaway Jumpers Full Highlights (2015-16 Season Dirkilation)
Since learning of the free-agency curse which afflicted the Dallas Mavericks, due to the construction of the American Airlines Center defiling a 1600’s-era Catholic missionary, Dirk Nowitzki found that he could no longer sleep. His nights were restless, his days, groggy. Thoughts of the Mavericks’ free-agency failings persisted through any attempts to banish them, and…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki All 126 Three-Pointers Full Highlights (2015-16 Three-ilation)
Dirk Nowitzki stealthily made his way to the furthest corner of the American Airlines Center. Here, there was a forbidden door; he opened it and proceeded down the stairs that were revealed to him: the stairs that led to the remnants of the old Spanish mission upon which the arena had been built. Dirk wandered…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki 43 Points/8 Threes Full Highlights (1/27/2004)
A real gem here. Quality highlights of this guy are hard to find, and for good reason. Dirk Nowitzki managed to stick in the league just for a few years, only starting around 10 of the games where he didn’t get a DNP, which was often. Despite the predraft hype surrounding him, he was just…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki All 106 Fadeaway Jumpers Full Highlights (2014-2015 Season Dirkilation)
(Description is a continuation of this season’s first video: https://youtu.be/I196J8Ev63I ) Walking around my apartment, which has somehow been modified to ignore the rules of spaciality, I engage in conversation with the hundreds of NBA role players which currently occupy it. They have been here the whole season, keeping me company while I compiled their…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki All 145 Fadeaway Jumpers Full Highlights (2013-14 Season Dirkilation)
Dirk Nowitzki sat down at his desk, finally having made himself ready for this task of greatest import. Getting out the flamboyant feather pen that he kept around for occasions such as these, he looked at the blank parchment in front of him, wondering if he would know what to write. He had never been…
Read MoreDirk Nowitzki 35 Points/1 Game-Winner Full Highlights (3/30/2013)
Deep amongst the stacks of the NBA archives, a bearded Germanic giant, brow furrowed in concentration, was hunched beside piles of exceedingly old, musty documents. The knowledge he sought was near; he could sense it, but not with any of the traditional senses. As if a divine presence controlled his hands, he carefully paged through…
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