A single grimy lightbulb illuminated the sparsely furnished room. A large man sat a cluttered desk, starting intently at the wall. Behind him, a black-and-white dog sat whimpering, pushing his bowl against his owner’s leg with his nose. “Shhhh, Tornjak. I feed you very soon. Being quiet now. Daddy is think.” Jusuf Nurkic muttered distractedly,…
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Jusuf Nurkic 17 Points Full Highlights (3/7/2017)
Jusuf Nurkic has a lot of attributes, too many to list here. He has nostrils. That is but one of his many attributes. Nostril-having. Bosnian is another thing that he is, a thing that would definitely appear on an encyclopaedic collection of his attributes. Such an exhaustive list of the attributes he possesses would surely…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 17 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/4/2017)
Seeing how Jusuf Nurkic is playing in Portland, it’s kind of disappointing that they couldn’t make him work in Denver. But that’s water under the bridge now. Everyone has moved on, probably. There isn’t a single person involved with all this stuff that still holds a grudge against any of the other people. What, you…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 18 Points/6 Assists/5 Blocks Full Highlights (3/2/2017)
Jusuf Nurkic and his teammates were gathered in a Portland nightclub, celebrating their latest victory. Liquor was flowing freely; trays full of shot glasses were being brought to their tables in a never-ending stream, and expensive bottles of wine were crudely guzzled without remorse. “And then Kanter tried to post him up and he blocked…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 19 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (2/28/2017)
Jusuf Nurkic had 19 points and 5 assists tonight, which you can tell from the video title. What you can’t tell, and what you can only get a glimpse of in the thumbnail, is that he also set a new career-high in facial expressions, with 53. Only a small handful of the very best ones…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 12 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (2/23/2017)
I watched a bunch of this game, because it was the first game to start after the way-too-long All-Star break. I was desperate, what can I say? I didn’t care that it was two mediocre teams mediocrely mediocring each other. I had to watch. I needed to watch. And here’s what I saw: Terrence Ross…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 13 Points Trailblazers Debut Full Highlights (2/15/2017)
Well, it happened. Everyone knew this moment was coming, and it came. Jusuf Nurkic has been traded. The Nuggets gave him his chance in the NBA, but things there didn’t end up working out, and now it is time for him to take the next step in his career with Portland. What he did in…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 15 Points Full Highlights (1/2/2017)
“Hey Nikola,” Jusuf Nurkic said, approaching his teammate in the locker room. “We need have conversation.” Nikola Jokic looked up from putting on his shoes and gave Jusuf a wary look. “Sure.” “Everybody on the team hate you,” Jusuf stated bluntly, having already figured out the lie he would tell his teammate to hurt his…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 17 Points Full Highlights (12/10/2016)
Someone once told me that Bismack Biyombo was a good defender. And this wasn’t just any old bloke. This was someone who I respected, greatly, telling me this. A certain NBA writer… not going to name names or anything, but they have just been exposed as wrong, wrong, WRONG. Because Jusuf Nurkic abused Biyombo all…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 18 Points Full Highlights (11/3/2016)
Jusuf Nurkic: a leading candidate for the Most Improved Player award? Yes. Jusuf Nurkic: forever cursed by the strange ghoulish creature shown in the thumbnail? Also yes. Let’s just hope the curse is one of those delayed-release or slow-acting ones so that he can get that MIP trophy in his award case before all his…
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