When Wayne “Beef W” Ellington dropped nineteen points in the second quarter alone, you know what I was doing? I was planning a major expansion of the Wayne Ellington shrine that I have in my closet. The shrine consists of a number of intricately-carved wooden totems dedicated to the Waynemaker, and before every game of his I go into the shrine and make offerings to the One Who Brings the Wayne. And if Ellington was going to make it a habit of making six three pointers in a quarter, the shrine would have to be expanded to match the divine splendor of this three-point shooting deity.
I was already making notes for the design and construction of an elaborate wooden altar upon which I could make blood sacrifices to his name, but then it turned out that the only point he scored in the second half was a technical free throw. So, much to my disappointment, I had to set aside my expansion plans for the time being. Twenty points in a game is obviously great, but it’s not that unusual for Ellington. Thirty points would have been awesome. Forty points would have been even better. I guess Spo just didn’t want to embarrass the Hawks any more than he already was by having Ellington make eighteen three-pointers in a game.
Nevertheless, after the game I returned to the shrine and offered some prayers to the One Who Brings the Wayne. I don’t want him to punish me for not being a good enough believer.