Lonzo Ball 13 Points/11 Assists Full Highlights (12/14/2017)

Thanks to the sensationalist and irresponsible actions of the TNT broadcast crew, my Lonzo Ball three-ilation is ruined. It was to be the ultimate showcase of his wonky side-head form, but now, it will be nothing, because it won’t exist. I will not tolerate a so-called “three-ilation” that doesn’t depict every single three a player made. And I would hope that you wouldn’t tolerate such a thing either.

Here’s the deal: unless a player is lying motionless on the court, you do NOT cut away from live game action to show them. I’ll go even further and say that if they’re not obviously dead and already starting the decaying process, don’t show them. If there’s no maggots, I don’t want to see it. I want to see the basketball, you know, the whole reason I’m watching the frickin’ game.

“Oh no! LeBron got poked in the eye and is delaying getting up so he can cherry pick! Everyone panic! Oh no! Who needs to see Lonzo Ball actually hit a three for once in his life? What about LEBRON?????”

Jesus didn’t sacrifice himself for this.

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