“Hey Tayshaun, we need to talk.” It was Mike Conley. “Why don’t you come with me to the weight room.” Tayshaun drained a last three-pointer before following Mike out of the gym. He walked into the weight room and saw Austin Daye sitting on the bench press, with the rest of his new Grizzlies teammates sitting around him in a circle. “Why don’t you take a seat next to Austin.”
Tayshaun sat. He wondered if this was some kind of initiation ritual. Were they going to make him and Austin kiss? Would he have to drink dog food smoothies?
“We’re all worried about you two,” Mike started. “I know that being in a new situation, it’s tough. And, we just want to let you know, that you can come to us for help. Anytime. Day or night, we’re all here for you, man. That’s the Grizzlies brotherhood pact.”
Austin and Tayshaun exchanged an uncertain glance. “What are you talking about?” Austin asked.
Conley looked uneasy. “You know, we…we never see you guys eat anything, and it’s hard to sit on the sidelines and watch your new friends struggle with anorexia. You shouldn’t have to hide it from us.”
“We’re not anorexic!” Tayshaun exclaimed.
“But you’re so skinny! How could you NOT be anorexic?” Tony Allen interjected. “You guys make Anthony Davis look like Shaq. You two could get jobs at a haunted house as skeletons!”
Mike nodded in agreement. “There’s no point lying to us. We just want to help.”
“I’m out of here,” Tayshaun said, standing up. “I’m going to go work on my unstoppable midrange jumper a little bit more, and then I’m going to go over to Mickey D’s and eat a couple orders of chicken nuggets. Why don’t you go stage an intervention with Randolph over there, I hear he’s got a different kind of eating problem.”
Zach flipped him the bird while everybody laughed. “Screw you man!”