One of my biggest regrets in life (other than letting it all fall apart with my beautiful Jennifer) is not making a C.J. McCollum midrangeilation for last season. By the time I realized that I wanted to make such a video, it was too late. Because that time was just now. Just now I am…
Read MoreDay: October 26, 2016
Jonathon Simmons Career High 20 Points Full Highlights (10/25/2016)
When Jonathon Simmons was led, blindfolded, to a secret subterranean dungeon underneath the AT&T Center, he was fairly sure that he had been kidnapped by terrorists, even when the man leading him repeatedly stated that he was one of the assistant coaches. But then, the blindfold was taken off. In the dimness of the torchlit…
Read MoreJoe Johnson 29 Points Jazz Debut Full Highlights (10/25/2016)
Do you ever watch a highlight video but instead of getting hyped you just kind of sit there because you know you’re watching the regression of the NBA back into early-00s iso-ball? I sometimes do. It’s like “wow it’s so cool that this guy is getting buckets but damn, does he ever get set up…
Read MoreNoah Vonleh 11 Points Full Highlights (10/25/2016)
You know how long I waited to do Noah Vonleh highlights last season? I’ll tell you: THE ENTIRE FRICKIN’ DURATION OF SAID SEASON! He showed some flashes (maybe just one flash, actually) at the end of his tenure with the Hornets, so I thought that a new team, a new atmosphere, and a starting gig…
Read MoreGeorge Hill 19 Points Jazz Debut Full Highlights (10/25/2016)
“…OFFICIAL MOST UNEXPECTED THINGS THAT WILL HAPPEN IN THE 2016-17 NBA SEASON POWER RANKINGS” “1. Anthony Bennett will average eight points per game. This is because the Nets will be garbage. The Nets’ garbageness will surprise nobody, but Anthony Bustett managing to bumble his way into a large number of double-digit scoring games should bamboozle…
Read MoreRodney Hood 26 Points Full Highlights (10/25/2016)
Soon after the crystal tendrils of Adam Silver’s hyper-evolved posthuman form had spread over my body and fully overwhelmed it, there was a brief period of darkness. I could feel my consciousness being transferred from my mortal human shell into the perplexing computer-like structure. All at once, I lost the feeling of gripping cold on…
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