Manu Ginobili 18 Points Full Highlights (2/4/2017)

Since I have already determined through my intrepid journalistic investigations that Manu Ginobili is regularly supplied fresh bodies by terrifying entities from an otherworldly realm that he accesses through a cursed stained-glass window in his home, we know that there’s no reason for him to retire any time soon. Why retire when your body is always fresh, uninjured, and free from aches and pains? However, we also know that he has to retire at some point to keep up appearances and prevent us from getting suspicious.

He could retire at the end of this year, especially if the Spurs win the championship (stranger things have happened; less strange things regularly happen). But he only needs to play one more season after this one, and then he can add his name to the list of NBA players who played in their forties. You can be sure that none of those other players had the aid of a pact with beings from another dimension to regularly receive a new body, but Ginobili is confident that nobody will find out his secret, so in the eyes of the world, his appearance on that list will be totally legitimate.

Could Ginobili keep playing past next season? It’s very possible given what we know about his body. But there’s also the human factor: Tim Duncan is no longer around, the Spurs’ “big three” is shattered forever, so there’s not as much tethering Ginobili to the NBA. He might just return to his native Argentina and be a coach there or something. Or go on TV and sell baldness remedies. So, DTB’s OFFICIAL PREDICTION is that Ginobili plays at least part of the 2017-18 season and retires after that.

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