Ian “The Clarksman” Clark did me a favor by having a good scoring game immediately after I conceived of his new moniker. Now I look like a genius for coming up with a nickname that praises his shooting ability. For now, just pretend that this video isn’t nothing but floaters, and also pretend that floaters count as “shots” in the same way jumpshots count as “shots”. Your playing along in this fantasy is crucial to the success of my bold, visionary new nickname.
I actually just came up with another nickname for Clark that might make my first one obsolete. “Clarks II”. Get it? Like the movie Clerks II but it’s his last name instead? It’s especially relevant and clever because Clark mostly makes two-point field goals. That’s where the II comes in. I’ve only ever watched the funny parts of the movie on YouTube, and I don’t really know what it’s about, but that doesn’t matter because the joke stops at the title in this case. Whatever those long-haired slackers were doing in that movie doesn’t really have an effect on the quality of my awesome new nickname.