Bobby Portis 21 Points Full Highlights (3/9/2019)

Bobby “God Dang It Bobby” Portis has been a nice pickup for the ‘Zards. I don’t know what the point of a good pickup would be for that team right now, since they should be tanking for R.J. Barrett, but if their short-term and misguided goal is to make the playoffs (a goal which is rapidly becoming unreachable thanks to the annoyingly steady mediocrity of the Heat and Hornets), Portis is helping them do that.

I was definitely feeling their locker room at lost some of that crazy animosity that they had at the beginning of the year. The team had gotten soft, with John Wall literally getting soft (someone tell him that caloric intake needs go way down when you’re not playing a game every other day and practicing in between). No more Austin Rivers. No more Morris (whichever one they had, I don’t remember anymore and I don’t care). No more Dwight Howard. They needed someone to be hard-edged to restore order to the softness, and Portis is helping that cause as well.

His three-point shooting is totally unsustainable. If you think 46 percent from deep is sustainable, you can sustain my nuts in your mouth. But even when he inevitably regresses, he’ll still be a pretty good offensive player, capable of scoring in a lot of ways. I look forward to seeing him play with Wall next year (is he even under contract too lazy to check), because Portis is exactly the type of player who Wall magically (because he’s a literal Wizard) turns into a beast.

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