Tomas “Czech Your Privilege” Satoransky just keeps having these good games. He’s having good games so regularly that I am forced to come to the conclusion that he is actually a good player, and not just an average player punching above his weight due to a sudden abundance of playing time. This is his ninth…
Read MoreMonth: March 2019
Marvin Bagley 22 Points/4 Blocks/3 Threes Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
What I really want to do right now is find comments from Kings fans after some disappointing preseason game for Marvin Bagley and post the comments so that others can ridicule their lack of faith. In fairness to them, the Kings have given their fans very little reason to not assume the absolute worst in…
Read MoreJustin Jackson 19 Points Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
Justin Jackson’s 11-point first quarter had me freaking out a little bit. Only a little bit, because I knew from past experience that he wouldn’t keep it up, but you know that Carlisle told him to go out there and show his old teammates what they were missing out on. And even if Jackson didn’t…
Read MoreBuddy Hield 29 Points/7 Threes Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
Lately I’ve been having bad dreams about what transpired in the zoo parking lot on that fateful night a few months ago. The short version of the story is, I took me and Buddy (my twelve-foot-tall 3D-printed purple plastic naked sentient statue of Buddy Hield) to the big zoo in the big city to play…
Read MoreWayne Ellington 23 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
Since adding Wayne “Beef W” Ellington, the Pistons are 12-5. Their recent push to cement themselves in the playoff picture shouldn’t be attributed solely to the efforts of the man they call Waynemaker, but it actually should because Ellington’s spicy shooting of screens allows Blake Griffin to operate in pretty much exactly the way he…
Read MoreDewayne Dedmon 18 Points/3 Blocks Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
Dewayne Dedmon AKA Dedmonstrations AKA Dewaynemaker AKA Judge Dedd AKA Dedmon Walking continues to play enough like a stretch five that he should get a relatively sizable contract this summer. In addition to his three-point accuracy and noted ability to catch alley-oops, he should also be viewed as a good character guy because he goes…
Read MoreTorrey Craig 15 Points Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
I bet there would be more hype for Torrey Craig if everybody was under the mistaken impression that he was a Welshman from Wales. His name totally sounds Welsh, so if you didn’t know any better, you would totally think he was from Wales. If I asked my mom right now where she thought a…
Read MoreTrae Young 23 Points/11 Assists Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
I will be honest and forthright with you: making all these Trae Young videos is getting tedious. It’s just SO MANY ASSISTS. And SO MANY POINTS. This sounds like I’m complaining because I am complaining. Young was not supposed to be this good, this consistently, this quickly. He was supposed to have good games some…
Read MoreThomas Bryant 22 Points Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
I don’t even know if anybody remembers Dwight Howard anymore. The only way you would ever think about him is if the Wizards’ big man situation was drawing some kind of negative attention due to its badness and you thought to yourself, “The Wizards could really use Dwight Howard right now”. But the big man…
Read MoreTroy Brown 13 Points Full Highlights (3/21/2019)
Just like Pokemon fanatics have to catch all the Pokemen that they can, so too does DTB have to catch every NBA scrub he can. And guess what? I just threw my Pokeball at Troy Brown Jr. and it bopped him square on the forehead. He squealed “TROY BROWN JUNIOOOOOOR” as he turned into vapor…
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