Sometimes I wonder what I did in a previous life for me to be cursed with this existence. My anger towards god/the cosmic oversoul/quantum randomness is especially pronounced when I think about Serge Ibaka. He’s got it all: -Can dunk (I will never dunk, I’m too old now) -Is rich (my Patreon proceeds, while nice,…
Read MoreMonth: December 2019
Robin Lopez 17 Points Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
Robin Lopez is normally thought of as the more “traditional” center out of the two Lopez twins thanks to his preference for the post-up game and his inability to shoot from long range (until this season anyway). Perhaps due to that reputation, I always thought of Fropez as being a decent rebounder, but I just…
Read MoreErsan Ilyasova 17 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
When you think of your personal list of players who are least likely to get a triple-double, Ersan Ilyasova should feature prominently on that list. And if you don’t have such a list ready to go in your mind, you should get to work developing one so you can pull it out for chicks and…
Read MoreBryn Forbes 18 Points Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
Bryn “Forbearance” Forbes is not as good a three-point shooter this season as he was last season. Last season, he was a 43% shooter from deep, making him one of the best in the league. This season, he’s shooting 36%, which is fine (especially at the volume of shots he takes) but is only a…
Read MoreDarius Garland 18 Points Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
One of the reasons the draft works so well is because the best players go to the worst teams, allowing them the most chances to score tons of points and get everyone all hyped up for them. This increases the overall excitement of the league by quite a bit. If highly-touted rookies got to just…
Read MoreDamion Lee 18 Points Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
With 15 rebounds last game and 12 rebounds in this one, it’s looking like Damion Lee has discovered a little-known NBA truism: that rebounds are there for the taking and anyone who wants to try for them can have them. Russell Westbrook is a high-profile player who takes advantage of this in order to get…
Read MoreCoby White 18 Points Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
Coby White’s field goal percentage of 36 percent is one of the lowest for players who play real minutes. It’s a good thing that he’s had a couple really hot games shooting the ball, or he’d be way in the pits. But as of the time of this writing, he’s only 69th (nice) in that…
Read MoreJordan McRae 20 Points/1 Dunk Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
I’m too lazy to really figure it out, but I’m pretty sure that at one point during this game Jordan McRae was 1-for-9 from the field. Maybe it was, like, 1-for-8 or 1-for-10, but definitely 1-for-some-big-number. And this was fairly late in the game, too, like around the start of the fourth quarter. So imagine…
Read MoreGary Payton II 15 Points/6 Steals Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
Gary Payton II has come in to the Wizards rotation straight from the minor leagues, going directly from being a premier G-League player to playing over 30 minutes per game for an actual real-life NBA team. The ‘Zards are battling some injuries right now, so the minutes were there for the taking (because you know…
Read MoreJonathan Isaac 19 Points/7 Steals Full Highlights (12/28/2019)
Forget the Andrei Kirilenko comparisons for Jonathan Isaac. We’re going in a different, but still somewhat similar direction with a new comparison: Josh Smith! Everyone likes to make fun of Smith for bricking his way out of the league with inadvisable jumpers, but he was a really legit stat-stuffer for a lot of years with…
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