Bobby Portis 23 Points Full Highlights (4/22/2021)

The Bucks showed a graphic during the telecast which alleged that Bobby Portis was fifth in the league in three-point percentage. Maybe I’m just not as good a fan as I used to be, because I didn’t realize that Portis was close to the league leaderboard for 3P% at all. I knew he was really good at three-pointers. And I also knew that his midrange is super wet, and that he has not punched any of his Bucks teammates so hard that they have to go to the hospital, and that I love him.

The graphic needs to be updated though, because Portis’ 5-for-5 shooting performance in this game vaulted him up to second place on the 3P% leaderboards, with a sizzling 48.5% three point accuracy rate. I don’t know by which mechanism those graphics get created, but if the Bucks’ broadcast techs need some help, I’ve mastered the use of GIMP to make video thumbnails, so I can probably figure out how to modify the stats graphic to show Portis in his proper slot between Joe Ingles (49.4%) and Joe Harris (48.2%). I can also probably figure out how to use Blender to make one of those fancy 3D shot charts that they sometimes show, but I would make it with vaporwave aesthetics to cover up the fact that my 3D modeling ability is on par with that of a toddler.

Portis doesn’t have nearly the high volume that the other top three-point shooters have. He’s attempted roughly a third of the threes that Joe Harris has attempted, for example, and even Kent Bazemore (#22 in the league) has attempted more. However, anybody trying to discredit Portis by bringing up his low shooting volume should be aware that he might just break into your house and punch your orbital bone until it’s broken into a thousand pieces, and then stare coldly at you with his googly eyes while you beg for mercy, so you’d better shut up.

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